


Dark love

by TwoBoys2Love



Series: Dark and Light [2]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Hurt Jensen Ackles, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 02:16:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 24,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9636419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoBoys2Love/pseuds/TwoBoys2Love
Summary: Jared is a business man but his work has never been on the right side of the law. Once he met his young lover, Jensen, Jared realized he wanted a different life. With the help of his right-hand man, Jeff, Jared secretly plans his retirement from "the business". But the grapevine is active and Jared's enemies see his relationship with Jensen as a weakness to be exploited. When Jensen is taken, Jared is terrified for the first time in his life.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the spn_reversebang challenge. Thank you so much to darklittleheart , for creating such great art! It was fun working with you! onlythefireborn you are a talented and patient beta. Thank you so much for your time!! Any errors left are my own :D
> 
> art post - [here](http://darklittleheart96.tumblr.com/post/157009624770/more-dark-love-by-twoboys2love-summary-jared)

  
Jensen’s hand was tangled in the back of Jared’s hair. He had a fist full of that smooth, brown, mane and he yanked Jared’s head back as he thrust his hips forwards.  
  
Moonlight streamed in the floor-to-ceiling windows of the Penthouse. The light made Jared feel exposed and vulnerable, even though he was in the safety of his own bedroom so many floors above the city.  
  
The heat and width of Jensen’s member filled Jared, and he let out a yell. He curled his fingers into the sheet under him. Each time Jensen drove his hips forward there was a little pain and a crazy wave of pleasure that stole Jared’s breath away.  
  
They weren’t talking anymore. It was just about the way that their bodies were slamming together. Each push of Jensen’s cock deep into Jared’s ass pushed the air out of his lungs. He was breathing in time with Jensen’s hard thrusts.  
  
His back arched, the muscles in his neck strained against Jensen’s hold on him. Everything ached, but he was teetering on the edge of the most amazing cliff and no longer cared if he fell.  
  
His balls ached. He was so hard that even the slightest touch of the sheet was painful before the pleasure appeared.  
  
Jensen gasped. His hips jolted forwards, and he released his grip on Jared’s hair. Nails dragged down the center of Jared’s back, and fire trailed down his spine.  
  
Jensen’s pulsing cock and the sweet moan that seeped from his mouth made Jared’s arms go weak. He couldn’t hold himself up a moment longer. His cheek pressed to the sheet, Jared gasped for air as Jensen thrust his hips forward yet again. The hand that had bruised Jared’s hip slid forward to encircle his throbbing shaft.  
  
Jensen squeezed at the base until Jared was ready to scream. Then the fingers stroked forward, and all of Jared’s skin came alive. His entire body tensed for a fraction of a second, and then he came so hard he couldn’t breathe. Come pulsed out of his cock, and he collapsed onto the bed like a feather floating to the ground.  
  
Jensen’s weight on his back was comforting, and Jared slid a weak arm forwards to weave his fingers in between Jensen’s.  
  
Soft lips pressed to the nape of Jared’s neck, and he couldn’t help smiling into the sheets.  
  
Summoning the last of his energy, Jared rolled, flipped towards Jensen’s sweaty body, and pinned _him_ to the bed.  
  
The green of Jensen’s stunning eyes had almost disappeared behind his pupils. His long eyelashes rested briefly against his freckled cheeks as he blinked. Jensen was beautiful.  
  
Jensen had been beautiful the day Jared had first seen him a year before, and he was even more beautiful lying there in Jared’s bed, covered in sweat, his teeth sunk into his bottom lip coyly. He was twenty-one years old, but he looked younger.  And he belonged to Jared _completely_.  
  


  
“You tired, old man?” Jensen teased. The smile on his lips was flirtatious. Jensen was young _and_ insatiable.  
  
“Shut up,” Jared growled. They both knew he was older, but it was of little consequence to Jensen. He had _never_ cared about the eight years that separated them, though it had worried Jared. Even when Jared hesitated to get involved, Jensen had pushed until he got what he wanted. What he had _wanted_ was Jared.  
  
Jensen’s fingers glided through Jared’s long hair to smooth it back away from his eyes. Jensen always liked to see Jared’s eyes. He said it was how he knew how Jared felt, whether he was lost in thoughts of other things. “What are you thinking about?”  
  
“You,” Jared answered easily. When he had a spare moment to breathe, his thoughts drifted to Jensen.  
  
Jensen shifted slightly beneath Jared. He was a few inches shorter, slighter, his body still with the slimness of youth. He was strong, though, and Jared could feel muscles tensing beneath him.  
  
“What are _you_ thinking about?” Jared asked. He always wanted to hear what was going on in his lover’s head. Jensen’s mind was almost as beautiful as _he_ was.  
  
“I’m thinking,” Jensen began in a low voice, “that you and I need to spend more time together like this. I miss you when we’re not together. You work too much.”  
  
Jensen sighed, and even though there was still a smile on his face, he looked a little sad and tired. There were shadows under his eyes.  
  
“You should get more sleep.” Jared slid off Jensen’s body but kept pressed against his lover’s side.  
  
When Jensen turned onto his side so he could gaze into Jared’s eyes, his smile faded. “If I sleep more, when will I see you?”  
  
It was an ongoing challenge for them, had been since Day One. Jared knew it was the truth, so he didn’t bother disagreeing or trying to come up with an answer. Rather than speaking, he spread his fingers wide on Jensen’s chest and moved them slowly down his body. He could feel the sharp rise of Jensen’s hip bone, the curve of his thigh. Sliding his hand further back, Jared grabbed a handful of Jensen’s tight ass. “I’m here now.”  
  
“You are,” Jensen said quietly. His full lips pressed to Jared’s cheek, then slid down to the corner of his mouth. The kiss was soft, gentle, and slow. “But what if I want you _all_ the time?”  
  
The subtle twang of Jensen’s Texan accent made Jared smile. He could listen to Jensen talk forever and never tire of it.  
  
There was a beeping sound from the bedside table, and Jensen groaned before tightening his arms around Jared’s neck. “No.”  
  
“Go shower,” Jared said gruffly. “You’re all sweaty.”  
  
“You love it,” Jensen retorted, but he sat up slowly and stretched his arms above his head before climbing to his feet.  
  
Jared took a few moments to let his gaze travel over Jensen’s body. His chest had a few freckles, and since he’d been going to work out, his abs had tightened up a lot. His thighs were muscular and covered in a dusting of blond hair.  
  
“Stop staring, and check your phone,” Jensen said over his shoulder as he padded towards the bathroom.  
  
After watching the bathroom door close, Jared rolled over onto his belly and reached out for his phone. He unlocked the screen with his thumbprint and read his text.  
  
 _ **Jeff** : we need to talk. urgent._  
  
Jared tilted his head to the side until his neck cracked as he stared at the screen. After a while, he tapped out an answer.  
  
 _ **Jared** : I’ll be there in 20._

 

  


  
  
  
When Jensen emerged from the shower fifteen minutes later, Jared was dressed in black jeans and a button-down shirt in dark red. Jensen said it was his favorite color on Jared.  
  
“Where do you think you’re going?” There was a light blue towel wrapped around Jensen’s waist. His hair was tousled and still damp, and his freckled skin was glowing.  
  
“Gotta meet Jeff.” Jared pulled his leather jacket on and smiled as Jensen ran a hand down the front zipper of it.  
  
“If you stay, I could fuck you all night.”  
  
The confidence of those words sent a wave of heat slithering down Jared’s spine. He could tease Jensen about it, sure, but they _both_ knew that Jensen’s boast was accurate. The way Jared’s cock twitched, the way his heart sped up slightly, was just more evidence that he believed Jensen.  
  
At risk of losing his composure, Jared reached out and ran his finger along the edge of the towel. Smooth skin, tight, slid under the pad of Jared’s finger. “Come out with me tonight.”  
  
“Later?” The warm green eyes stared up at Jared from under long, dark lashes.  
  
Nodding, Jared let his finger trail up the middle of Jensen’s chest. “I’ll send Gil for you at about ten.”  
  
When Jared’s nail caught the peak of Jensen’s nipple, they continued to gaze into each other’s eyes.  
  
Jensen nodded and sank his teeth into his bottom lip.  
  
If Jared didn’t leave, he was at serious risk of not leaving at all. He groaned and rubbed at the heat of blood that was stinging his cheeks. “I have to go. See you later.”  
  
Jensen smiled and tilted his chin up to press his lips to Jared’s.  
  
Just like always, the kiss sent a zing of pleasure through Jared’s veins.  
  
“Love you. Be careful,” Jensen whispered against Jared’s lips. He pushed Jared’s hair back off his forehead once more and then stepped back.  
  
“I always am.” Jared sighed unhappily. He really didn’t want to leave Jensen, but there were things to do.

 

  


  
  
  
Gil was waiting in the foyer when the elevator door slid open in front of Jared. The tall driver stood near the front door with his hands clasped behind his back. As usual, he was dressed impeccably in a dark blue, slim-cut suit. His dark auburn hair was cropped short and swept back from his face. “Hey, Jared. How’s the view from the Penthouse this evening?”  
  
“Not too bad,” Jared answered as he strode towards the door.  
  
Jared loved being on the twenty-fifth floor, living in a tower, fortified and safe. It was well worth the massive price tag.  
  
Once Jared was settled in the back of the black Lexus, Gil closed the door and slid behind the wheel. “Office?”  
  
“Please.” Jared watched the street lights begin to slide past the window.  
  
The office was a nightclub called _The Dead Reckoning_ , one of Jared’s many business-related purchases. It gave him a legitimate place to do his work and relax when he had the time. _Dead Reckoning_ was a nautical term that implied that the exact location was known. It was a reminder to Jared of where he had come from and that he had a destination.  
  
The city looked tired and old. It had rained earlier in the evening, and the pavement was dull and damp. The number of people on the streets increased as they drove toward the middle of the city.  
  
“I haven't seen Jensen in a while,” Gill said as he changed lanes. “How is he?”  
  
“You’ll see him tonight.” Jared couldn’t help allowing himself a slight smile. “Pick him up at ten and bring him down.”  
  
“Is that safe?”  
  
There weren’t many people who would question Jared. Gil was a friend, and he always meant well. Gil also knew Jared’s business. He knew that operating outside the law meant that everything … and everyone that was important to Jared were always at risk. “I can't keep him hidden away, Gil. He’s far too attractive for that.”  
  
Gil chuckled softly as he headed down a side street. He never drove Jared the same way two days in a row. “He’s not _my_ type, but you know I get it.”  
  
Jared’s smiled broadened as he caught Gil’s eye in the rear-view mirror. Gil’s wife was gorgeous, one of the sweetest people Jared had ever met.  
  
But Jared’s smile faded quickly as they approached the nightclub district. The crowds of people, the catcalls, and the stark lighting were all a reminder of how cold Jared’s world could be. “Don’t send anyone else to get him. Just you from now on.”  
  
Gil nodded once and turned down Center Street. Soon Jared could see the neon sign that declared the _Dead Reckoning’s_ location in dark blue against the night sky.  
  
The car pulled up in front of the Club, and Jared reached for the door. “See you later.”  
  
“You bet.”  
  
Jared climbed out of the car, closed the door, and tugged his jacket down before heading to the entrance.  
  
There was already a line, and Jared nodded his greeting to some familiar faces.  
  
“Hello, Sir.” The doorman unhooked the red velvet rope barrier and pulled the door open for Jared.  
  
He _could_ use the back door or one of the side entrances, but he liked people to know he was there. It was good for people to see that he felt safe at the Club. His presence also decreased the likelihood of people acting rashly; his response to violence was swift, and he had a reputation.  
  
As soon as he stepped inside, Jared could feel the thump of the bass in his chest. The Club smelled like a second home: alcohol, wisps of perfume and smoke, and the strange mingling of fresh sweat on the dance floor and the food appearing from the kitchen.  
  
It took a few moments for Jared’s eyes to adjust to the dimly lit Club and bursts of light from the dance floor. There were already as many people _in_ the Club as were lined up outside. But it was early. They certainly weren’t full.  
  
Through a gap in the crowd, Jared saw the familiar silhouette of Jeffrey Dean Morgan. He was Jared’s right hand and his oldest friend. His broad shoulders tensed slightly when he saw Jared, and he motioned to the upstairs office.  
  
Jared nodded.

  
“Hello, handsome.”  
  
“Hi, Danneel.” Jared leaned down and kissed the petite redhead’s cheek. Her short, tight-fitting, silver dress caught the light and sparkled. All of her thick, red hair was piled up on her head as though it had been casually done. But, everything about Danneel’s appearance was always deliberate.  
  
“How’s my gorgeous boy?”  
  
Jared smiled and pressed his hand to the small of Danneel’s back to draw her in closer. “He’s coming down tonight, you can see for yourself.”  
  
“Good. Will you have time to chat later?”  
  
Jared nodded. Danneel always had many irons in the fire. As bar manager, she ran the Club, but she did much more than that. She brought women in off the streets who wanted a different life. They worked for her in the Club, and Danneel twisted Jared’s arm when she found someone who should be in school, needed a place to live, or some other kind of help. She had recruited Jensen to her cause shortly after he had arrived, and the two of them were a force to be reckoned with. If Jared was hesitant to agree to something Danneel wanted, he often found himself hearing about it once he got home. “I always have time for you, Danneel.”  
  
“As it should be,” she quipped. Popping up onto her toes, she kissed Jared’s cheek and disappeared into the crowd.  
  
Jared headed for the stairs.

 

  


  
  
  
  
Jeff was already perched on the corner of the big oak desk when Jared closed the door behind him. “How are you, Jeff?”  
  
“I’ve had better weekends.” Jeff smoothed his fingers over his short salt and pepper beard. His dark hair and warm brown eyes made him look approachable, but Jeff was made of steel.  
  
“Drink?”  
  
“No thanks, Jared.”  
  
Jared stopped at the small bar by the door and poured himself a whiskey before taking the seat behind the desk. “What’s up?”  
  
“There’s a problem we need to deal with together,” Jeff said as he slipped his suit jacket off.  
  
“Okay.” Jared wasn't anxious to hear about anything that Jeff needed his help with. Jeff handled almost everything; it was all part of Jared’s big plan to try to retire. Retirement at twenty-eight wasn’t something Jared had planned. But Jensen had changed Jared’s life equation. Jensen had been through a lot on the streets, more than someone his age should have been through. Jared wanted a different life.  
  
“You know about the break-ins that have been happening in our area, yeah?”  
  
Jared nodded.  
  
“Two deaths, both gun shots to the head, execution style. We hadn’t figured out who the hell it was. There was another one last night, about two blocks from here.” Jeff frowned and rubbed at his forehead.  
  
“That’s pretty fucking close,” Jared said and set his glass down on the desk very slowly. “You’ve dealt with this kind of thing for a long time, what do you need me for?”  
  
“They left a body on display.” Jeff folded his jacket over his arm and sighed.  
  
“So?” In their line of work, it wasn’t uncommon for them to see a dead body. It wasn’t even uncommon for them to be the cause of one. _That_ was all part of the business they were in. It might not be _legit_ , maybe not even legal, but it was how Jared had lived his life. If he could go back and make different choices, he might; but that wasn’t how life worked.  
  
Jeff turned to look at Jared, concern etched onto his face. “I have a photo … from before we called the Cleaner.”  
  
 _The Cleaner_ , an anonymous associate of theirs who would arrive at a _scene_ and remove any trace of forensic evidence. They may not have caused the problem, but Jeff would have wanted to make sure that nothing led back to them. Jeff pulled out his phone from his front jacket pocket, but he held onto it and tapped it against his thigh for a few moments.  
  
The look on Jeff’s face was worrying Jared. “What’s wrong, Jeff?”  
  
“It’s a message for you, and you're not going to like it.” After he took a deep breath, Jeff held his phone out to Jared. “You were obviously meant to see this body.”  
  
When Jared took the phone, he hesitated a moment before looking down at the screen. The instant he saw the photo of the body he knew why Jeff had wanted him to see it.  
  
The man in the photo was young. He’d been stripped, and his throat had been slit from ear to ear. The pale skin of his throat was covered in the blood that had gushed out of his body.  
  
The man in the photo looked almost exactly like Jensen. In fact, he looked enough like Jensen that Jared’s mouth went completely dry. All the time Jared had invested in his poker face couldn’t save him from the way his expression hardened. It was his worst nightmare, that someone from his world would come at him through Jensen. He flicked across the screen to the next photo. Someone had painted a message on the floor in blood. _Move over or pay for it._  
  
Jared had been threatened a great deal, but this particular message had a familiar tone to it.  
  
“I’m sure you can see why I need you with me on this one.” Jeff winced when he took his phone back.  
  
“Unfortunately.”  
  
The body was intended to rattle Jared, and it had certainly done that. Even though he still looked every bit as calm and composed as before, inside was another story. He fought the urge to call Jensen and see if he was okay, tell him to stay home. But he was safe. The body in the phone _was not_ Jensen.  
  
“What do you think?” Jeff asked.  
  
“I _know_ this looks like something Pellegrino would do,” Jared said. It was the first thing that had popped into his mind. The rest of his thoughts were focused on Jensen’s safety, what he should tell his young partner, and keeping his expression neutral.  
  
“Fuck. That’s what I thought,” Jeff muttered. “Think I’ll have that drink now. Another?”  
  
Jared nodded and slid his glass towards Jeff.  
  
Jeff grabbed the glass and headed over to the bar. He poured a couple of shots and brought two glasses back to the desk. “Here.”  
  
Wrapping his hands around the glass, Jared rested his elbows on the desk. “Pellegrino’s been quiet for a long time. Why now?”  
  
Shaking his head, Jeff sank down onto the chair across the desk from Jared. “I know you’re trying to keep your plans quiet, Jared, but people see the shift in things. They see me dealing with things you used to handle. People are gonna start to wonder about what’s going on. When people wonder, they speculate. Speculation has a nasty habit of becoming rumor, regardless of truth.”  
  
The shift in things. Yes. The plan that Jared had kept between himself and Jeff. He wanted out. He wanted to retire. He pressed his lips together and nodded at Jeff. They had been changing the balance of power as subtly as they could, but Jeff was correct. People had noticed that Jeff was taking a more active role.  
  
After he drained his drink, Jeff set the glass down. “If people think there’s a power shift coming, the stupid ones will think there’s room at the top.”  
  
“If they question _your_ ability to make tough calls, they _clearly_ don't know you. If they think that you won’t deal with what needs to be dealt with, they don’t know your temper.”  
  
“Truth.” Jeff smiled and looked a little proud of himself for a few moments.  
  
“We need to hit back,” Jared said in a low voice. The last thing he wanted was to add to the violence he had been responsible for over the years, but some things demanded a swift and clear reaction.  
  
The smile faded from Jeff’s face, and he nodded once. “And Jensen? Are you going to warn him? He’s a tough kid. Growing up on the streets-  
  
“No,” Jared said. Jensen may have been living on the streets when he had first come to the Club, but there was an innocence to him that Jared didn’t want ruined. He tapped his thumbnail against his glass and watched as the amber liquid rippled.  
  
Mark would know to strike out at someone Jared loved. He and Mark Pellegrino had been friends once. When Jared was young, they had worked side by side, planned many a job together and fought together. Pellegrino had been a mentor to Jared.  
  
But when Pellegrino had found out that Jared was gay, everything had changed. There had been a huge fight, and Pellegrino had made it clear that Jared was filth and not fit to be in control of anything. The thing was, people had already begun to see that Jared was a hard man, but he was also fair. He took care of his people, and … he cared _about_ them. When they had parted ways, most of their people had followed Jared. On that loyalty, with years of work, he’d built his own little empire. Pellegrino was violent, angry, and unpredictable. He always underestimated people, and he certainly underestimated their loyalty to Jared. Pellegrino had been pushed out to the fringes and sidelined while Jared built his business. It was a whole lot of bad blood.  
  
Jared wet his lips. “Is he still working with Olsson?” Ty Olsson was one of Pellegrino’s best friends. They’d been together a long time, and he was exactly the man Pellegrino would rely on to leave Jared such a grisly message.  
  
When Jared looked up for confirmation, Jeff nodded.  
  
“Then we need to _fix_ that problem.  
  
Jeff nodded again.  
  
“And, Jeff? I need to be there.”  
  
“I had a feeling you were going to say that.” Jeff tapped his knuckles on Jared’s desk as he stood. “I’ll get things sorted.”  
  
As the door closed behind Jeff, Jared leaned back in his chair and ran his hand through his hair. It was going to be a long night.

 

  


  
  
  
There were always people who wanted to see Jared. It was all part of the way things worked. He had always been involved in every part of the work they did, even the parts that fell short of legal. Sometimes it was most important to keep an eye on those parts of the business.  
  
So, he spent hours speaking to people at the Club, writing emails, answering calls, and staring out the one-way mirror he’d had fitted so he could keep an eye on the Club. The Club was the one place where things were all legal. They dotted every i and crossed every t to make sure the Club was beyond reproach. Something in Jared’s life needed to be clean.  
  
Danneel popped by the office at one point. She brightened Jared’s evening without even being aware of it. She had found a new young woman to work at the bar: Alona, far too young and sweet to be on the streets.  
  
By the time Jared had listened to Danneel for twenty minutes, he had agreed to put Alona through college.  
  
Danneel had pranced back down the stairs looking very pleased with herself. What she didn’t know was that Jared had no intention of saying _no_ to her request. She was the heart and soul of the place. Jared would protect her and her ideals with his last breath.  
  
When he looked down at his phone, it was shortly after ten. He smiled and closed his laptop. Time for Jensen to arrive.  
  
Jared headed downstairs into the whirl of sound dulled by the soundproofing in his office. Some people found it overwhelming, but Jared liked the way the cacophony pushed everything off to the periphery of his mind. It brought him a little bit of peace.  
  
He saw Gil first. Then, following Gil’s watchful gaze, he found Jensen. Already feeling calmer, Jared leaned back against the bar and folded his arms across his chest.  
  
Jensen looked amazing, as always. He wore tight jeans and a white t-shirt under a denim jacket. His hair was perfectly messed up, and Jared could just stand there and watch him for hours.  
  
When Jensen saw Danneel, he darted away from Gil and headed straight for her. She was the one person there who had known Jensen longer than anyone else. As innocent as their relationship was, even that bothered Jared. He wanted all of Jensen to himself. But, that wasn’t the way the world worked.  
  
Jensen enveloped Danneel in his arms and kissed her, and Jared looked away. Gil was still right behind Jensen and would be there until Jensen was at Jared’s side. Those closest to him had all of Jared’s trust, and Jensen was the most important person in his world.  
  
Jared headed back upstairs to the office to wait.

 

  


  
  
  
The door cracked open, and Jensen peered inside. “Hey handsome, you single?”  
  
“I could be for the right man,” Jared deadpanned. His hands dragged down over his face; then he wove his fingers together.  
  
Jensen stepped inside with his hand pressed over his heart. “Ouch. Right in the heart.”  
  
Jared smiled, but the image of the body in the photo flashed in front of his eyes, and he shook his head slightly to rid himself of the reminder. It wasn’t Jensen.  
  
The door snicked shut behind Jensen, and he smiled. “What’s got you looking so tense?”  
  
It was just like Jensen to see exactly what Jared didn’t want him to see. It was one of the many reasons that Jared was so drawn to Jensen. He saw through the walls that Jared had built up for the rest of the world.  
  
Moving slowly, Jensen headed straight for Jared. He kicked Jared’s boots apart and pushed between his legs, then stood there looking down at his lover. “Why don’t you talk to me?”  
  
Even though it sounded like a question, Jared knew that he wouldn’t be expected to actually provide an answer. He let out a long breath and leaned into Jensen. His arms slid around his lover’s slender hips, and he pressed his cheek to Jensen’s belly. The heat of his firm body warmed Jared’s cheek even through the t-shirt.  
  
“I wish you’d let me help you,” Jensen murmured as he combed his fingers through Jared’s hair slowly.  
  
Jared held on tightly and inhaled deeply as he tried to let go of his fear. He concentrated on the way Jensen smelled. He liked to wear a lemongrass cologne, and even though he didn’t wear it every day, the scent always lingered around him. “You feel good.”  
  
“ _You_ look worried and tired.” Fingers still moved through Jared’s hair, and he closed his eyes to focus on the sensation.  
  
“Can I do anything?” Jensen asked softly.  
  
Jared finally sat back slightly so he could look up at his younger lover. “Everything’s fine.”  
  
“Liar.” Jensen grabbed Jared by the arms and urged him up to his feet. His fingers slid along Jared’s belt, the buckle clinking as Jensen pulled it free.  
  
“Gil’s right outside the door,” Jared said in a low voice. Heat was already blossoming low in his belly.  
  
“I don’t care, and you don’t, either.” The button on Jared’s pants popped open under Jensen’s touch, and then the zipper slid down.  
  
“Jensen.” As hard as he tried to sound stern, Jared knew he wasn't pulling it off. He had trouble saying no to Jensen, but he found it impossible when Jensen was touching him.  
  
“What?” Warm fingers slipped down the back of Jared’s jeans and pushed the material down. “Mmm. No boxers.”  
  
A moan built in Jared’s throat, so he clamped his teeth on his bottom lip. He shifted his hips restlessly, already hard.  
  
Jensen grabbed a handful of Jared’s ass and squeezed. “Door is unlocked, Gil’s outside. You better be real quiet.”  
  
For a few moments, Jared was pretty sure he stopped breathing. “Now? Someone could-”  
  
Leaning in quickly, Jensen claimed Jared’s mouth roughly. He tightened his grip on Jared’s ass and urged his hips forward. He gasped into the kiss when their hips collided and shoved his free hand under the front of Jared’s shirt.  
  
The banging of Jared’s heart seemed loud enough to fill the room. When Jensen’s full lips parted, Jared slid his tongue forward. Lust boiled up inside Jared’s body, and he grabbed at Jensen’s arms. He just wanted his lover close; he wanted the smooth scent of Jensen’s cologne all around him. Just like every other moment since Jared had first seen Jensen, he just. Plain. Wanted. Him.  
  
There was a sound outside the door, probably just someone passing by, but Jared broke from the kiss. He could hear the muted tones of Gil’s voice and then nothing but the muffled sound of the music from below. “There are still people who need to see me.”  
  
“Always business,” Jensen murmured against Jared’s cheek. His lips made their way along Jared’s cheekbone, down along his jawline. He left gentle, teasing kisses on Jared’s skin until it was more like torture.  
  
“Jensen, stop.” Jared held Jensen’s shoulder, keeping him a few inches away.  
  
But the way Jensen tilted his head to the side was defiant and stubborn. His dark green eyes were determined and serious. He pressed forward like he was made of liquid; he just _seeped_ closer to Jared with every breath.  
  
Jared closed his eyes for a few moments and tried to fight back the urge to just give in to the way he wanted Jensen.  
  
“Please,” Jensen whispered. His lashes fluttered, and his fingers danced over Jared’s thighs light as a breeze.  
  
Heartbeat after heartbeat, each one a little louder in Jared’s ears than the one before. His hand darted up to grab the back of Jensen’s neck, and Jared lunged forward to claim Jensen’s mouth. The kiss was rough, hard. and Jared lost track of his breath.  
  
Jensen grabbed the bottom of Jared’s shirt and pulled it up and off roughly before doing the same with his own.  
  
As Jared’s lips found their way to the sweet skin on Jensen’s neck, he felt deft fingers slipping under the waistband of his jeans.  
  
A moan vibrated in Jensen's throat, and Jared grazed his teeth up and over Jensen’s Adam’s apple.  
  
Jensen tugged Jared to his feet so he could slide both hands down the back of his jeans. Nails dug into Jared’s ass, then scratched a fiery trail as Jensen pulled his hands back up.  
  
“Fuck,” Jared whispered. He grabbed Jensen’s bare shoulders and held him still for a handful of moments. _Those eyes would be the death of him._  
  
Leaning up onto his toes, Jensen pressed his lips gently to Jared’s and pushed Jared’s arms aside so he could turn him towards the desk.  
  
Jensen pushed firmly between Jared’s shoulder blades to bend him over the desk. The laptop dug into his side, and Jared pushed it out of the way. Jensen tugged and pulled on Jared’s jeans until they encircled his knees. Then Jensen’s fingers hooked into Jared’s hair and pulled until he had no choice but to look out over the Club.  
  
“You’re still loose,” Jensen said gruffly as his slick fingers slid deep into Jared’s body.  
  
Jared grunted his agreement and then closed his eyes to block out the view of all the people below. All those bodies twisting and sliding made him dizzy.  
  
“Don’t you dare close your eyes,” Jensen whispered in Jared’s ear.  
  
The insistent push of Jensen’s cock replaced his fingers. He inched forwards, hips rocking slowly as Jared’s body allowed him in.  
  
As the lights above the dance floor whipped through the color spectrum, Jared caught glimpses of Jensen’s reflection in the window. His lover was always beautiful, and the briefest glimmer of his flesh in the window made Jared clench his hands into fists.  
  
Jensen had one hand on the small of Jared’s back, the other behind his head. His cheeks were flushed, his lips even more full than usual because of their desperate kisses. And his gaze was locked onto Jared.  
  
Everything in his body responded to each touch of Jensen’s fingers. His skin was alive. Each thrust of Jensen’s cock nudged Jared closer and closer to coming. His balls felt like they contained hot lead, and the skin on his cock stretched so tight it felt like it was on fire.  
  
All the insane pressure building inside of him meant he wouldn’t last long. Soon he wouldn’t be able to hold it all in. It was close enough to _too much_ that Jared felt like he might never make it back from the edge.  
  
The speed of Jensen’s thrusts increased, and he grunted softly with each push.  
  
The edges of Jared’s nerve endings were all singed. His heart raced, so much pleasure vibrating through him that he was drowning.  
  
When Jensen came, he let out a moan that breathed quivering shivers through Jared’s muscles. His balls clenched, and he came as Jensen pushed into him one last time.  
  
The release left Jared panting, weak, and covered in sweat. It was perfect. As the feeling slowly returned to his body, he realized that Jensen was lying on top of him. “You’re heavy.”  
  
“You’re not romantic anymore,” Jensen muttered. He pressed a soft kiss to Jared’s neck and then groaned as he eased his softening cock free and straightened up.  
  
Rolling over slowly, Jared let his arms flop to either side. It wasn’t the first time Jensen had fucked him on the desk, but the Club had always been closed before.  
  
“Aren’t _you_ a picture,” Jensen said in awe as he gazed down at his lover. He sat down at the side of the desk. His fingers trailed over Jared’s palm before he grabbed Jared’s hand. “I love you.”  
  
Jared smiled through the sweat-damp strands of hair that were plastered to his forehead.  
  
“No one gets to see you like this but me,” Jensen said.  
  
Nodding, Jared struggled up onto his side so he could lean down and kiss Jensen's fingers. He let his lips ghost over Jensen’s knuckles and sighed.  
  
For a while, Jensen stared down at Jared. Then he slid off the desk and pulled his hand free. “Go rest on the couch. I’ll be right back.”  
  
Jensen disappeared out of Jared’s field of vision. Jared never liked the way it felt when that happened.  
  
After a deep breath, Jared sat up. For a few seconds, he was light-headed, and he squeezed his eyes shut. “One day you're gonna give me a heart attack.”  
  
“What?” Jensen’s blonde head peered out from the bathroom.  
  
“Nothing.” Jared slipped off the desk and looked around him. A towel hit him in the chest. “Thanks.”  
  
After he’d cleaned himself up, Jared wiped up the top of his desk, and then tossed the towel into the garbage can. He straightened his shirt and pulled his jeans up.  
  
He headed over to the leather couch that Jensen had picked out shortly after they’d started sleeping together. He sank down onto it gratefully and put his feet up on the coffee table, then buckled his belt. “Come back,” Jared said. “I want you here.”  
  
Jensen emerged from the bathroom rosy-cheeked and smiling. His jeans were still undone and hanging off his slender hips. He’d pulled his t-shirt back on, but there was water splashed on the front of it. When he reached the couch, Jensen flopped down on his back and rested his head on Jared’s lap.  
  
Those green eyes peered up at Jared, and he felt something inside him soften. He frowned as he fought the reappearance of the photo on Jeff’s phone. No matter how many times he reminded himself that the photo was of a stranger, it still left him feeling scared. He didn’t like feeling scared. “How are you doing?”  
  
Jensen let out a contented sigh. “I’m good. What about you? I can tell something is bothering you.” Jensen lifted a finger and ran it over the furrows in Jared’s brow.  
  
Smiling slightly. Jared ran his fingers through Jensen’s hair. “Just work.”  
  
“Your _work_ is never simple; I know that much.” Jensen narrowed his gaze, studying his lover’s face.  
  
“Don’t worry. Jeff and I will take care of it.” Jensen was right though; nothing was ever simple. Jared was in the business of complicated-as-fuck.  
  
Jensen sat up and shifted around so he could stare straight into Jared’s eyes. “You know, I’m on your side. You can tell me anything. We can _fix_ things together.”  
  
There was a part of Jared that really wanted to tell Jensen everything, but he didn’t want to involve Jensen in anything Pellegrino was doing. There was possibly a part of Jared that worried that Jensen would run if he was scared; he’d lived on the streets, he knew that running was nearly always a good solution. “It’s an old problem.”  
  
“So?”  
  
“Jeff and I will deal with it.”  
  
Jensen just stared, and Jared could see the stubborn set of his jaw. He wasn’t going to give up easily.  
  
“My old partner.”  
  
“Pellegrino?”  
  
Jared nodded. “He’s been causing trouble. He sent me a message, and Jeff and I are going to let him know we got it.”  
  
“Why did things go so bad between you two, anyway?”  
  
“Not tonight,” Jared said quietly. There were so many things he hadn’t told Jensen because he just didn’t want all the wrong that he’d done to taint Jensen’s goodness.  
  
“Yes, tonight.” Jensen could be very obstinate.  
  
There were so many other things that Jared would rather talk about.  
  
There was nothing but silence from Jensen as he stared at Jared.  
  
It was that fierce determination that was always a problem for Jared. “Pellegrino was my friend, but I knew better than anyone that he had issues. He could go off for no reason on people. I thought it was different with me.”  
  
“Different how?” Frown lines appeared on Jensen’s forehead.  
  
One day Jensen might give up on Jared if he kept secrets from him. But he’d learned early in life that the less people knew about him, the safer they were. The more walled-off Jared kept himself, the safer Jensen was. But there were times when a weary sadness appeared on Jensen’s face.  
  
Jared ran his fingers through Jensen’s dark blonde hair. “I figured he’d be okay if I told him that I was gay.”  
  
“But he wasn’t okay?”  
  
“That’s an understatement.” Pellegrino’s outburst had been explosive. Jared would never forget the blaze of disgust in Pellegrino’s eyes or the way spit had flown from this mouth when he had started to yell. “He was convinced it made me weak, that people would lose faith in me.”  
  
“That’s a ridiculous thing to think,” Jensen said quickly. “It has nothing to do with strength or -”  
  
“I know, Jensen.” Jared couldn’t help smiling at the way Jensen leapt to his defense.  
  
Looking a little annoyed, Jensen grabbed Jared’s hand and threaded their fingers together. “Well, it doesn’t matter. People trust you. They trust Jeff.”  
  
“Pellegrino has never been very pleased with that, though.”  
  
“He thinks he should be in your place,” Jensen said quietly. His free hand settled on Jared’s thigh and smoothed over his jeans.  
  
“He does.”  
  
“And has he tried to get to you somehow?” Jensen was one of the most perceptive people that Jared had ever met.  
  
“He’s just trying to cause problems. He’s an asshole.” It wasn’t a lie, but it omitted the worry that was gnawing at Jared. He could keep Jensen safe; he knew it. He didn’t want Jensen to realize that being here in his arms could be something dangerous; he wanted him to think of it only as the safest place in the world.  
  
“You’ll be okay?” Worry was etched all over Jensen’s freckled face.  
  
“I’ll be okay,” Jared answered. He had faith that he and Jeff could nip the problem in the bud. With his last breath, he would make sure that Jensen was safe.  
  
“Do you ever plan to get out?”  
  
It was a question that Jensen had never asked before, but Jared had expected it to come eventually. Absolutely, he wanted to get out. The plan he had with Jeff was putting that into motion. But, _hope_ was a dangerous thing. It could make people lose sight of the edge of the cliff. “And leave all this?”  
  
“I love you,” Jensen said.  
  
It made Jared’s chest ache to see that Jensen didn’t even expect him to say it back. He just couldn’t; he wouldn’t do that to Jensen. In the world of _shit_ that surrounded him, Jensen was an oasis. He was everything that was uncomplicated and amazing and worth living for. Jared nodded.  
  
“Okay,” Jensen said, but he still looked a little unconvinced.  
  
“What do you want to do with your life?” Every time Jared found out about something that Jensen needed or liked, he would make it happen. After a while, though, Jensen had caught on and stopped mentioning things. But, there were so many questions Jared didn’t know the answers to.  
  
“I just want you. I want you to be _happy_ , though. I don’t know if I’ve ever really seen that.”  
  
Jared rubbed at the ache in his chest. “ _You_ make me happy.”  
  
The smile on Jensen’s face contained more sadness than Jared liked to see. He pressed his lips to Jensen’s jaw.

 

  


  
  
  
They always took a while to leave the Club, because everyone seemed to want to visit with Jensen. Danneel nearly always caught Jensen more than once, and she was the first to distract him on their way out of the Club.  
  
Jared stayed back a bit with a watchful eye on Jensen. He only glanced away when Danneel wrapped her arms around Jensen and planted her blood-red lips on Jensen’s cheek.  
  
The lights made Danneel’s dress sparkle as though she were covered in diamonds. The only thing that was brighter was the smile on her face.  
  
Danneel probably loved Jensen almost as much as Jared did. She would do anything for Jensen. They had been fast friends the moment Jensen had appeared at the Club. All Jared knew was that he had arrived, asked Danneel for help to get off the streets, and she had agreed. Because Jared rarely wanted to speak about his own past, he hadn’t ever pushed Jensen to reveal his own.  
  
“You good?” Jeff’s gruff voice broke through the pounding bass of the music.  
  
“I’ve been better,” Jared answered. “He’s dangerous. Unpredictable.”  
  
Jeff’s hand on Jared’s shoulder was a comforting weight. “We’ll fix this. I have our best people looking into it already.”  
  
Jared tore his gaze away from Jensen and turned to stare at his friend. “Don’t forget that I want to be there.”  
  
“Oh, I won’t. I’ll be in touch soon.”  
  
Jeff squeezed Jared’s shoulder and then disappeared into the crowd.  
  
When Jared looked back over at Jensen, Danneel had disappeared, and Gil was talking to him.  
  
Their heads were bowed together so they could hear each other over the music. Gil was alert, as usual. As he chatted, his gaze moved constantly.  
  
But when Jensen looked up and smiled at Jared, it was like the whole place around them disappeared in a fog. The smile on Jensen’s face was the one Jared always recognized as his. It was subtle but beautiful. His lips covered his teeth, but there was the hint of impishness in his gaze.  
  
With a deep breath and the warmth of that smile, Jared felt the heavy weight on his shoulders lighten a little.

 

  


  
  
  
It was business as usual for a few days before Jeff texted Jared to let him know they were on for that evening.  
  
Almost immediately, Jared’s heart quickened as adrenaline flooded into his bloodstream.  
  
“What’s happening?”  
  
Jared hadn’t realized that Jensen was behind him. “Jeff is coming to get me. We have something to take care of.”  
  
For a while, the silence in the Penthouse felt thick and uncomfortable. Jared slipped his phone into his back pocket and turned around slowly.  
  
Jensen was standing close to the bank of windows that ran the length of the wall. His gaze was distant as though his thoughts were a million miles away. “Is it dangerous?”  
  
“Everything is dangerous, Jensen,” Jared said as lightly as he could manage.  
  
“Why do you do that?” Jensen asked quietly.  
  
“What?”  
  
“Answer questions with no real answer at all.”  
  
It had to come eventually; the time when Jensen would run out of patience for Jared’s evasion. “I need you to be safe.”  
  
Turning his head slowly, Jensen peered up at Jared from weary eyes. “No one hears what we say in here. No one knows. It’s only you and me.”  
  
It didn’t feel that way to Jared much of the time. There were so many things he wouldn’t say aloud in Jensen’s presence. All the _shit_ didn’t belong anywhere near Jensen. “I don’t lie to you.”  
  
“That’s because you don’t tell me anything, Jared.” There was no sign of anger on Jensen’s face; if anything, he looked a little defeated.  
  
“I can’t, Jensen. I just can’t.” It had never been something that Jared could put into words. He didn’t want Jensen to have to know about the things he’d done, but as simple as that sounded in his mind, it was impossible to make it sound like the right decision.  
  
Folding his arms across his chest, Jensen tilted his head slightly. “You know I was on the streets before I met Danneel, right?”  
  
Nodding, Jared lowered his gaze. His phone vibrated in his pocket; probably Jeff texting him to say when he would be picking Jared up. There was no way Jared was going to check.  
  
“I saw a lot out there,” Jensen said. “I did a lot -”  
  
“- Don’t. The past is the past for both of us,” Jared said slowly and steadily. Jared didn’t want to know what Jensen had done before he’d walked into Jared’s life. If he could persuade Jensen to keep his past to himself, Jared could convince himself that the crimes he’d committed, the violence he’d been party to, didn’t matter.  
  
“But the things you won’t tell me _aren’t_ the past, are they?” Jensen looked worn. He sighed and walked over to Jared.  
  
For a few moments, Jensen just looked up into Jared’s eyes like he was searching for all the answers. “I love you, Jared. But I wish I knew all of you.”  
  
“Jensen-”  
  
Jensen held a finger to Jared’s lips to silence him. “I know. Gil will be over to babysit, you’re going out with Jeff. You’ll be home as soon as you can.”  
  
“Jensen,” Jared said against the smooth fingertip. He didn’t want to have a conversation full of unanswered questions right before he left. There was always a chance that he wouldn’t come back home. With Jeff at his side, it was a very slight chance, but _fuck_ , the evening needed to be different.  
  
“I get it,” Jensen said. “You’re trying to protect me. I just think you’re trying to protect yourself, too,”  
  
“I _am_ protecting you,” Jared said firmly. He shoved Jensen’s hand out of the way, leaned down quickly, and claimed Jensen’s mouth before he could say another word.  
Jensen relaxed into Jared’s hold and slid a hand up into his hair as he parted his lips willingly.  
  
Jared could taste the submission as he pushed his tongue into the warm, wetness of Jensen’s mouth. Jensen was _his_ in that moment and every moment.  
  
As his tongue swept across the roof of Jensen’s mouth, Jared snaked both arms around Jensen’s slim frame and tightened his hold.  
  
He loved the way Jensen felt so solid and real in his arms. It almost made Jared believe that everything would be all right.  
  
When he slowed the kiss, Jared let his teeth drag over Jensen’s plump, bottom lip. He pulled back and left only enough room for air between their mouths. With his eyes still closed he knew exactly what Jensen would look like. His cheeks would be touched with pink, his long lashes fanned out over the curve of his cheekbones. His pink lips would be slightly swollen and glistening.  
  
Wherever Jared went, he kept that image of Jensen with him. He’d created a place for it near his heart so it would help to keep it beating.  
  
Jared buried his face in the crook of Jensen’s shoulder. He would _never_ make Jensen stay with him but he _sure_ as hell didn’t want to live without him. Despite that, Jared would not relent. He wouldn’t tell Jensen anything that he didn’t need to know.  
  
Jensen tugged gently on Jared’s hair to get him to lift his head.  
  
Jared sighed and opened his eyes. He just couldn’t come up with any words that wouldn’t make things worse.  
  
“Jared?” Jensen stared _right_ into his lover’s eyes. “I love you. I’ll be here when you come home. So come back safely.”  
  
One last, soft press of Jensen’s lips, and he headed into the bedroom.  
  
Heart still pounding in his chest, Jared let his head fall back and groaned.

 

  


  
  
  
  
Jeff drove them to a small, dingy bar located miles from Jared’s territory. They parked down the side street and climbed out of the car into the misty evening.  
  
Jared pressed the car door closed and walked around to Jeff’s side.  
  
“You ready?” Jeff slipped his handgun into his shoulder holster and adjusted his jacket back over it.  
  
“Yeah.” Jared patted his own gun and loosened his tie slightly. The small of his back was already damp with sweat, and he plucked at the front of his shirt to pull it away from his body. “Let’s go see this asshole.”  
  
“You’re sure about the guns?”  
  
If Jared knew anything, he knew that Ty Olsson hadn’t changed over the years. When Jared had been on the way out of Mark’s life, Ty had been on the way in. Ty was impulsive, violent, and he enjoyed what he did. He’d seen Jared as a threat immediately and hadn’t been quiet about it. It wouldn’t matter what Ty had been _ordered_ to do – he would enjoy it. And he would certainly enjoy anything that hurt Jared. His biggest flaw was that he was over-confident. Jared was _counting_ on that ego to work in their favor. “I’m positive. No matter what I say to him, he’s comin’ after me.”  
  
Nodding, Jeff walked down the street and headed to the front door of Ty Olsson’s bar.  
  
The place was a dive. It was the kind of bar that had a filthy old floor covered in dirt and grime and disgusting bathrooms. Jared had been in a hundred bars like it over the years.  
  
The front door looked as though someone had recently fixed it after it had been kicked in. Obviously, they hadn’t fixed it very well, because it looked ready to fall off its hinges when Jeff pulled it open.  
  
There was a huge man just inside the door who stopped Jeff with a hand planted firmly in the middle of his chest.  
  
All Jeff did was raise an eyebrow, but he stayed still.  
  
“Get their guns and invite ‘em in,” a gruff voice called out from further back in the dimly lit bar. “They’re our guests.”  
  
A quick glance from Jeff confirmed that he too had recognized the voice as Olsson’s.  
  
Without waiting to be asked, Jared pulled out his handgun, popped the cartridge, and offered the muzzle of the gun to the man in front of them.  
  
Big-and-burly took Jared’s gun, then the one Jeff was holding out. “Arms out to the side.”  
  
“It’s rude to treat old friends like that, Steve,” Olsson called out. “Let them through.”  
  
As they brushed past the bouncer, Jared slipped the cartridge into his jacket pocket. They headed straight for the bar in the back.  
  
Olsson was behind it, towel over his shoulder, pulling a mug of draft beer.  
  
“You fellas want a drink?” Olsson said as he set the full mug down on the damp bar.  
  
Jared shook his head as he sat down on one of the old bar stools.  
  
“No thanks,” Jeff said. He remained standing just off Jared’s shoulder.  
  
“You guys look like you could _use_ a beer. Lighten up, guys.”  
  
Under the bar light, Olsson looked a lot older than Jared expected, but then he hadn’t seen him for a while. He had a military-short buzz cut and a couple of days’ worth of stubble on his face. Olsson had seen better days, but then, working with Pellegrino really seemed to suck the life right out of people.  
  
“We didn’t come here to socialize,” Jeff said flatly.  
  
“What can I do for you?” Olsson pulled the towel off his shoulder and wiped his hands on it before tossing it on the bar.  
  
“You left me a message,” Jared said as he stared at Olsson. Over the years, Jared had learned to keep his emotions in check around people like Olsson. The less people could read from him, the better.  
  
Averting his gaze, Olsson fidgeted with the mug of draft in front of him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  
  
“It was a very clear message, and I didn’t like it,” Jared continued. He wasn’t in the mood to play games. “I recognize when your boss has a hand in something. I just wanted to let him know that the message was received.  
  
“Is that why you’re here?” When Olsson looked up, there was a knowing smirk on his face.  
  
Jared looked around the place at the dirty tables, the overflowing ashtrays, and frowned slightly before turning back to Olsson. “Why _else_ would I come _here_?”  
  
Jeff laughed; a low rumble of a chuckle that made Jared’s shoulders relax slightly.  
  
“Well, we can't all live uptown, can we,” Olsson said dryly. “Oh. Wait. Maybe we all _can_ live there one day. Maybe sooner than you think.”  
  
“Right,” Jared deadpanned. Obviously Pellegrino had been feeding Olsson the Kool-Aid because he had delusions of grandeur. On the off chance that Pellegrino ever regained any of the old territory, he certainly wouldn't share it with someone like Olsson.  
  
“I’ll make sure that he hears you got his … note,” Olsson said threateningly.  
  
Jared sat there silently until a bead of sweat trickled down Olsson’s cheek. The guy had always been an asshole, but he’d become arrogant as well. That was never a good combination. “I’m sure you will. He probably keeps you on a short leash.”  
  
The scowl on Olsson’s face made Jared smile. As he got up, he brushed the back of his jeans as though wiping away the contagion of the place. “Jeff.”  
  
Jeff lifted one hand and waggled his fingers at Olsson before turning to follow Jared.


	2. Chapter 2

  
  
  


  
  
Outside the bar, Jared pushed the cartridge of ammunition back into his gun, then flipped the safety off. “Stay alert. He won’t be able to let this go; he’ll follow us out.”  
  
“You sure about this? You can wait in the car.” Jeff gripped Jared’s shoulder for a few moments before reloading his own gun.  
  
“I need to see it through.” Jared knew himself well. If he didn’t see Olsson go down, he wouldn’t be able to live with it being done. And he wanted it done; Mark’s message had been that Jared could lose someone he cared about, and he wanted to make sure the reply was clear. The young man in the photo had lost his life simply because he resembled Jensen, and Olsson was the kind of soul that craved violence like that. Jeff may have taken over the job of pulling the trigger, but Jared still took responsibility for what happened.  
  
“All right, then.” Jeff lowered his arm and tapped the muzzle of his gun against his thigh.  
  
At a sound behind them, Jared let his arm drop to waist level. He kept his grip relaxed and nodded to Jeff almost imperceptibly.  
  
“I feel like a drink at a _real_ bar now,” Jeff exclaimed loudly. “How about you, Jared?”  
  
There was a crunch like a footfall. Jeff and Jared spun in opposite directions and veered away from one another. A shot cracked. Jared heard a bullet ping off something behind them.  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, Jared saw Jeff’s arm come up, a flash as Jeff fired.  
  
The whole thing happened as though in slow motion. Jared watched the bullet slice through the air and slam into Olsson’s forehead.  
  
Olsson’s body spun and fell backward onto the road. His Colt skittered across the pavement.  
  
Jeff darted forwards and knelt beside Olsson’s shoulder. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a glove, slipped it on, and moved Olsson’s lifeless arm across his chest with his palm covering his heart. In a few seconds, he was back at Jared’s side. “He’s gonna get that pose?”  
  
Jared nodded. Once, when they were both young and had been foolish enough to swear allegiance to one another, Jared had pressed his hand over his heart. Pellegrino had laughed, but he’d done it as well. Allegiance was a fragile thing.  
  
“Let’s get out of here then,” Jeff said.  
  
They were back in the car and peeling out of the alley a few moments later.  
  
As Jeff palmed the steering wheel, he glanced over at Jared. “I’m dropping this car off at Sheppard’s garage tonight. It’ll be in pieces before dawn.  
  
Jared nodded again and watched the old buildings slide past the window.  
  
“You were right; you said he’d follow us and try something,” Jeff said as he turned a corner and things began to look more familiar.  
  
“He was always arrogant. I warned Mark when we first met Olsson that he would bring us more trouble than anything else.” Jared could remember the day he’d met Olsson. His gut instinct had been to turn around and walk away. There was something _off_ about him, something that had made Jared instantly distrust him.  
  
“Glad you always follow your instincts,” Jeff said as he pulled up in front of Jared’s building.  
  
The trip had gone quickly, and Jared realized he must have been lost in thought for a lot of it.  
  
When the car rolled to a stop, Jared opened his door and paused to look back at Jeff. “Thank you.”  
  
Jeff smiled and nodded. “You’ve always had my back, and you’ve done your fair share of cleaning up. Jensen is a great guy. You’re good together. This one’s on me.”  
  
There was a swell of emotion in Jared’s chest. Jeff was the best friend he’d ever had, and he was a hell of a business partner. There was _nothing_ that Jeff wouldn’t do for Jared, and vice versa.  
  
“Thanks.” Jared smiled, climbed out of the car, and headed inside. It had been a quick job, but he was bone-weary and his eyelids were heavy.  
  
  
The Penthouse was quiet when Jared arrived home. The lights were all off except one of the lamps in the bedroom. Jensen always left a light on for Jared.  
  
Jared had told Jensen he didn’t need to leave a light on; enough light from the city skyline poured in the huge windows. Jensen had said once that it wasn't about the light; it was about making sure that Jared came home to him. Jared wasn’t sure he understood, but he knew Jensen’s sweet heart, and it held Jared close.  
  
Jared stopped at the bar to pour himself a whiskey. He was surprised that he felt a little unsteady. But when it came to Pellegrino, Jared had learned to expect the worst.  
  
Kicking off his boots and moving silently to the bedroom door, he leaned against the door frame. When he brought the glass to his lips, he couldn’t help smiling over the rim.  
  
The bed sheets were all rumpled, Jensen lying in the middle. The dark sheets were a beautiful contrast to his rosy skin. He lay on his back with one arm tucked under the pillow beneath his head. His other hand rested on his belly where the sheet lay across his hips.  
  
Whenever he was alone in bed, Jensen was a restless sleeper. But with Jared at his side, Jensen slept like a baby.  
  
Sometimes it was hard for Jared to remember what life was like before Jensen was at home waiting for him. Jared hadn’t known how lonely he was until he’d met Jensen. The Penthouse was _home_ now that Jensen was there.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
_Jared was at the bar having a whisky when Jensen walked into the Club for the first time. The moment the door opened, Jared looked up, squinting into the late afternoon sunlight. The door swung shut, the light disappeared, and a young man was standing at the entrance. He was a little disheveled; his jeans were torn at the knees, and his sneakers had holes in them, but he still managed to look good. Smiling slightly, Jared drained his drink and went back to his paperwork.  
  
The next time he looked up, the young man was talking to Danneel. His hands were moving gracefully, and he was smiling as he spoke. Danneel was a rapt listener. It was difficult for Jared to look away. After an hour of trying not to watch the young man, Jared called one of the waitresses over and asked her to prepare a spare room in the back for the newcomer. He asked her if she had overheard the young man’s name. She had: Jensen.  
Before Danneel even asked him, Jared arranged for Jensen to stay in one of the back rooms at the _Dead Reckoning_ so that he could get off the streets. He’d told Jensen that he would support him financially for whatever he wanted to do: school, volunteering, finding a job. Jensen’s answer had surprised Jared. Without hesitation, albeit a little shyly, Jensen had said that he wanted to work with Danneel. He wanted to help get other people off the streets. When Jared had asked why, Jensen said it was important to help people and that he knew how it felt to be alone. It hadn’t been long after that Jensen had made his move on Jared._  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
Neither of them had been lonely since they’d begun seeing each other.  
  
“It’s creepy when you watch me,” Jensen murmured sleepily.  
  
Jared’s laugh was deep as he set his drink on the dresser and headed over to the bed.  
  
Jensen rolled onto his side and smiled as he ran his hand through his hair a few times. “Come to bed. and tell me something about Before.”  
  
Sighing, Jared sat down on the edge of the bed. Jensen sat up and pressed up against Jared’s back so he could reach around to begin unbuttoning Jared’s shirt.  
  
Jensen loved stories about Jared’s life _before Jensen_. He was insatiable when it came to knowledge about Jared’s past.  
  
As Jensen peeled Jared’s shirt off his shoulders, he placed a gentle kiss on Jared’s shoulder blade. “Tell me.”  
  
“When I was about twelve, my brother Jeff took me to my first carnival,” Jared began. He twisted to the side so Jensen’s fingers could make their way to his belt. “It was a different world. There were so many people there, bright lights that sparkled everywhere, so many different smells.”  
  
Jensen unbuckled Jared’s belt, undid his jeans. and pushed at them.  
  
Jared stood so Jensen could push his jeans and underwear down off his hips.  
  
“Was there a Ferris wheel?”  
  
“There was.” Jared nodded. “It seemed to me like it was miles high. But I’d never been any higher than the roof of our garage.”  
  
When he sat back on the bed, he pulled his socks off and lay down beside Jensen.  
  
“And did you get to ride it?” Jensen lay back down and slipped an arm over Jared’s chest.  
  
“I did. I could see farther than I’d ever been. I remember thinking that I would get out of that town one day.”  
  
“And you did,” Jensen murmured. His lips brushed along the top of Jared’s shoulder, and he smiled against his skin.  
  
“And, I did,” Jared said softly. He may have left his small-town world behind, but he’d paid a high price for it. Out of the frying pan into the fire.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
_The first-time Jared had killed someone he had been twenty years old. He was running money for a bookie, and a guy had been waiting for him in a dark alley behind his rooming house.  
  
Things were tough for Jared; he had a small room and a hot plate, two pairs of old jeans, and a jacket that had seen better days. He was tired of living hand to mouth. He wanted a job with the bookie, and the best way to do it was to prove how reliable he was.  
  
Reliable runners didn’t get robbed.  
  
The man had come at Jared as he jogged down the back stairs of his building. Before Jared had even thought about it, he had kicked at the man’s chest and knocked him back down the stairs. The man’s head hitting the concrete sounded like a watermelon splitting open. Several minutes passed while Jared stared at the pool of blood that was growing around the man’s head. His chest rose and fell, the breathing slowed, and then it stopped. Jared had killed someone.  
  
But, he had kept the money he was supposed to deliver and proved his worth._  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
Jared pressed his lips to the corner of Jensen’s mouth. “Go back to sleep.”  
  
Eyes already closed, Jensen nestled closer. “Everything went okay tonight?”  
  
Jared nodded and tugged Jensen against his chest. “Everything is fine now.”  
  
Jensen nodded ever so slightly. He was already falling asleep again.  
  
Jared turned his head so he could breathe in the scent of Jensen’s hair. It was one of the most comforting scents Jared knew of.  
  
Sleep would be a long time coming for Jared; there were too many thoughts racing around in his brain. Retiring by himself was one thing, but asking Jensen to leave the city with him was another thing completely. Jensen had grown up in the city, it was his first home after he left Texas. It was where Jensen had learned how to survive on the streets. It was where they had met. Jared had no idea how Jensen would feel about his life changing again.  
  
At least, for the time being, he had Jensen safe in his arms.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
The clank of barbells was the only sound in the gym. One of the first things Jared had done when he’d bought _Dead Reckoning_ was to convert half of the basement into a gym. Ever since it was finished, he and Jeff had worked out together three or four times a week.  
  
Jared sat down at one of the machines and adjusted the handles so his arms had to be fully extended to reach them. He set the weight for one hundred and fifty pounds, got comfortable, gripped the handles, and pulled.  
  
“You’ve been spending a lot of time at work this week,” Jeff said, in between bicep curls.  
  
“Just making sure to tie up as many loose ends as I can.” In truth, Jared was trying to hand over as many parts of his business to Jeff as he could. There was a lot of respect involved in changing leaders, and Jared needed people to feel respected and appreciated when Jeff took over.  
  
“You thinking about retiring sooner rather than later?” Jeff let the weights clunk to the floor and leaned forward to rest his forearms on his thighs.  
  
The weight felt heavier than usual, and Jared grunted as he pulled the handles down. “I want Jensen to be able to live a normal life, come and go as he pleases, without me worrying about sending him with a guard.”  
  
“I can see that.” Jeff picked up the barbells again, knelt on the bench, and started his triceps kickbacks. “What do you want for yourself, though ?”  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
_Jared had stopped counting the bodies at ten. It had never been his intention to become a criminal, but it had happened. He was desperate to get away from the bug-infested rooming houses, the drug addicts, and the packages of noodles for dinner every day. He did that by building himself a reputation. He would defend himself. He would do what he committed to. He could be relied upon to be tough when it was needed, ruthless if necessary. It was his ticket out._  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
Jared wasn’t always sure _what_ he wanted for himself. He knew that he wanted Jensen to be happy. He wanted to be able to forget to lock the door at home and not worry that something terrible would happen. There was a constant knot in his stomach when he was awake, and there were a million reasons for that. Jared had done a lot of things he wasn’t proud of, and a lot of things that could turn and bite him in the ass at any moment. “I want to be able to sit outside with a beer and relax.”  
  
Chuckling, Jeff switched the barbell to his other hand. “I hear ya. I mean, I don’t mind so much right now - but I can see wanting out after years of trying to manage everything.”  
  
When the weights clanked back into place, Jared stretched his arms out in front of him and looked over at his friend. Jeff’s t-shirt was drenched in sweat, his cheeks ruddy, but he looked so much fitter than he had a few years back. “You sure about this?”  
  
Jeff set the weight down on the bench and sat down so he could smile over at Jared. “Yeah. I’m sure. I want this. I don’t have a family, man. So, this business, the people in it _are_ my family. I don’t think I’m good at a lot of things, but I’m good at taking care of people and doing what needs to be done.”  
  
“You are, Jeff. You really are.” There were no doubts in Jared’s mind that he had made the right choice. “Thank you. I haven’t said this before, but leaving wouldn’t even be possible for me if you weren’t here. The thing about this business is that you can’t just walk away from it, because it falls apart.”  
  
Jeff nodded. He knew the business about as well as Jared. One of the things that Jared most admired about his friend was the way he cared about people. Jeff helped Danneel a lot when things got sticky for the young people they tried to get off the streets. Danneel was tough, but when she wasn't tough enough, it was Jeff who sorted things out. So far, they’d managed to keep most people out of trouble.  
  
Jared’s phone binged, and he reached over to grab it.  
  
**_Gil_** : At the Penthouse. Jensen’s not here, is he with you?  
  
All the blood in Jared’s body ran ice cold. He’d asked Gil to pick up Jensen while he was at the gym, so he could come to the club and work with Danneel and some of the new women who’d arrived. “Jensen’s not at the Penthouse.”  
  
On his feet in an instant, Jeff whipped his phone out and began tapping the screen.  
  
Jared phoned Jensen, but all he got was his voicemail. “Hi, I can’t get the phone right now. Talk.”  
  
“Jensen, where are you?” Jared ended the call and texted Gil.  
  
“He’s not with Danneel, she’s checking the floor upstairs,” Jeff said gruffly.  
  
Jared swiped the screen on his phone until he found the app that tracked Jensen’s phone. It showed up as still at the Penthouse. “Jesus. The phone is still at the Penthouse. We have-”  
  
“I’ll get the car and pull up out front, you check with Danneel on the way out.”  
  
For the first time in a long time, Jared ran full out.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
Jeff and Jared scared the shit out of the doorman when they burst in through the front door of Jared’s building. It took the man a few moments to be able to speak. He’d seen no one coming and going, and he certainly hadn’t seen Jensen leave. There was a back door to the building that was connected to the main staircase, plus several fire escapes that weren’t covered by video.  
  
The elevator seemed to move in slow motion as they rode up. Jeff’s hand was a heavy weight on Jared’s shoulder, but it did little to slow the pace of his racing heart. It had been a long time since Jared had felt genuine fear, and he didn’t like it. He didn’t like it _one_ bit.  
  
“We’ll find him,” Jeff said softly as he squeezed Jared’s shoulder.  
  
Jared couldn’t even bring himself to nod. There was something sick and heavy in his stomach, and he feared that it was his instinct telling him that things were never going to be the same again.  
  
The elevator door slid open, and Jared’s eyes widened. The door to their suite was ajar . He bolted out of the elevator without a thought about his own safety.  
  
“Jared! Wait!” Jeff called out.  
  
But Jared shouldered the door the rest of the way open and skidded to a halt. His heart pounded so hard in his chest that it hurt as he looked around. The place was a mess. The chairs were askew, the carpet had been bunched up against the sofa. Broken glass crunched under Jeff’s boots as he walked into the room and bent down. When he stood up, he held out a phone. “Jensen’s.”  
  
Jared nodded and took the phone from Jeff’s hand. That was when he noticed blood on the edge of the table. His hand shook when he pointed to Jeff’s left. There was a pool of blood on the floor the size of a dinner plate, and there was splatter all over the coffee table.  
  
“Kid put up a fight,” Jeff said softly. Something caught his eye, and he knelt by the blood. He picked up something and stood so he could hold it out to Jared.  
  
Jared’s trembling fingers curled around the stem of the flower that Jeff had picked up from the blood. It was a small pink flower, shaped like a champagne glass. The muted pink of the petal was covered by dark blood on one side.  
  
“What the fuck is that?” Jeff asked from Jared’s side.  
  
There was a buzzing sound in Jared’s ears; for a few seconds, he felt like he was going to pass out. Then all his instincts kicked in, adrenaline flooded through his body, and he could feel his hand steadying. “It’s a pink skullcap.”  
  
“And that means?”  
  
Jared’s teeth were gritted so tightly that his jaw ached, and he had to force himself to relax so he could answer. “It’s often called a Texas Rose . Jensen is from Texas originally. Mark is making a point, being … clever.”  
  
“Fuck.”  
  
They had Jensen. Mark Pellegrino _had_ Jensen. At least that meant Jensen was alive, at the same time horrifying and a relief. There was no way that Mark would kill Jensen quickly. That would be too easy, not nearly as painful for Jared as not knowing what was happening to his lover.  
  
“Get out, Jeff.”  
  
“Jared?” Jeff’s voice was tight with worry.  
  
“Get out!” Jared yelled. He’d never raised his voice to Jeff before, but it felt like his head was going to explode. He didn’t want Jeff at his side trying to reason away the fear that Jared knew was warranted. He _knew_ what Pellegrino was capable of, and it wasn’t good. It wasn’t good at all.  
  
Without another word, Jeff left the Penthouse and closed the door behind him. Jared knew that he wouldn’t go far. What Jared needed to do was calm the fuck down and think, but what he did instead was throw Jensen’s phone across the room and yell. He kicked at the broken coffee table and sent the pieces of it flying over the sofa and crashing into the wall. The string of swear words he let out echoed about the high ceilings, and then Jared sank to his knees.  
  
It was everything he’d been afraid of. Pellegrino had the one person that Jared would do anything for, the one person who mattered more than anything else in the world. Panting softly, Jared closed his eyes and pulled his phone out of his pocket. For a few moments, he tried to slow his breathing, and his finger hovered over Pellegrino’s contact in his phone. Of course, he’d kept it. He’d known that there would come a time when they would have to talk. He had just hoped beyond hope that it wouldn’t be because of Jensen. He’d been naïve, and he regretted that more than anything else he’d ever done.  
  
He touched his phone screen and held it up to his ear.  
  
“Hello, Jared,” said a deep, familiar voice. Pellegrino sounded like he was fucking smiling.  
  
“If you hurt Jensen, I will kill you,” Jared growled.  
  
The laughter that came from his phone made bile slither up the back of Jared’s throat.  
  
“See? Jared, that’s always been your weakness. You should never love someone too much, especially if they’re as fragile as your little flower Jensen. He put up a fight but didn’t stand a chance. Just ended up getting hurt. Hope you’ve got a cleaning lady; I hear they’re good at getting bloodstains out.”  
  
“You’ve got one chance to get out of this alive, Mark. Let him go, or-”  
  
“Don’t threaten me, Jared! You seem to be forgetting that you don’t have the upper hand here. And, really? You overstepped, don’t you think? You killed my right-hand man, and that was completely unnecessary, when all I did was send you a polite message.”  
  
“I will get you, Mark.” It was a promise that Jared was confident of.  
  
“You come after me, Jared? And I’ll cut out every freckle on that pretty boy’s face.”  
  
“I _will_ kill you, I promise you that,” Jared said firmly, then disconnected the call. He meant it with every cell in his body. He _would_ find Jensen, and he _would_ kill Mark with no regrets.  
  
Jared flipped to another contact and climbed to his feet as he texted Jeff to tell him to come back in. The door swung open immediately; Jared had known his friend wouldn’t go far.  
  
“Jared?” If Jeff noticed the additional damage, it wasn’t clear in his expression.  
  
“I’m … I’m ok.” Jared wasn’t okay but he’d learned years back how to compartmentalize his feelings. He could take all the fear and anger he felt and wrap it up and put it aside so he could do what needed to be done. “Mark has him.”  
  
“You spoke to him? Was that wise?”  
  
“I don’t care. I’m going to kill him,” Jared said flatly. “I’m going to find Jensen, and I’m going to _kill_ Pellegrino. I should have done it a long time ago.”  
  
Jeff was silent for a while, and then he stepped a little closer. “Jared, let me deal with this.”  
  
Before the words were out of Jeff’s mouth, Jared was shaking his head. “This is my fault. I need to find Jensen.”  
  
“Your fault?” Eyes wide, Jeff shook his head slowly as he frowned.  
  
But Jared knew otherwise. He’d always known that Pellegrino was dangerous and unpredictable. The fact that they’d been friends in the past had made Jared put off dealing with Mark. He’d hoped that Mark might feel the same way.  
  
“Jared? Please. Just let me see what I can find out. You want out? This is what it’s gonna feel like. You’d better get used to it.” There was a fierce expression on Jeff’s face. He was friends with Jensen; everyone was. Jensen was the kind of person that people were drawn to.  
  
“All right,” Jared said reluctantly. “But I go with you when we get him. He has to see me, he has to know I’m there after…”  
  
Jeff nodded quickly. Neither of them wanted to think about what Jensen might be going through. “I’ll head out now.”  
  
“Stay in touch,” Jared said as he watched Jeff hurry out.  
  
Jared stood there in the middle of the living room and looked around. It was unnerving to be there without Jensen, standing amid the debris. It felt like the walls might fall, or the ceiling might fly off. Without Jensen, the Penthouse was just a box.  
  
A tapping on the door made Jared look up. The door cracked open, and Danneel stepped inside. There was a worried smile on her pale face. She seemed _so_ different in jeans and an old t-shirt with her hair pulled up in a messy ponytail.  
  
“Jared? Gil brought me here. I asked him not to call you because I was sure you’d say no.” She came a few steps closer, looking up at Jared expectantly.  
  
“No?” A little confused as to what he was saying no to, Jared blinked a few times as he stared at Danneel.  
  
“To company. I didn’t think you should be alone tonight.” Danneel held out a hand as though she was approaching a stray animal.  
  
All Jared noticed for a while was that the color of Danneel’s nail polish was the same color as Jensen’s blood drying on the floor.  
  
“Jared?”  
  
Jared looked down at Danneel’s hand pressed to his chest. It seemed so tiny and frail, but the heat of it rattled loose the emotions Jared was trying hard to contain.  
  
When Jared finally met Danneel’s gaze, he could feel the hot burn of tears behind his eyes.  
  
Danneel closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around Jared.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
Hours trickled by like molasses, and Jared’s nerves were wrecked. By the time, Jensen had been missing for six hours - five in the morning - Jared was ready to start smashing furniture again.  
  
Jeff had called every hour. Jared thought it was partly to let him know that there was no news, but also to make sure Jared was still at the Penthouse.  
  
Danneel was curled up asleep on the couch. She’d helped Jared clean up the broken furniture, sent him away while she cleaned up the blood, and kept him talking for quite some time. Eventually exhaustion got the better of her. When Jared draped a blanket over her at four a.m., he noticed she had Jensen’s phone clutched against her chest. Even in her sleep, her brow was furrowed, and she looked worried.  
  
So, Jared stayed quiet, watched over Danneel, and waited for news from Jeff.  
  
When he looked at the time on his phone, he felt as though the minutes were so bogged down with the enormity of his loss that they weren’t moving forwards at all.  
  
Time crawled.  
  
For a time, Jared thought about phoning Mark again. He ran through all the scenarios in his head. He could threaten Mark again, but that would just prove to Mark that he had hit his target. He considered trying to bargain for Jensen’s life, but there was nothing Mark wanted more than what he already had: the upper hand. Begging was an option, but Jared _knew_ that would be the kind of thing that Mark would get off on. Jared begging would probably mean Mark would keep Jensen even longer. And continue doing what he was already doing.  
  
The thing was, Mark wouldn’t feel the need to phone Jared again. He wouldn’t let Jared hear Jensen scream. He wouldn’t send Jared a blood-soaked t-shirt. There was no reason for Mark to waste his time doing that because Jared had worked with him long enough to know _exactly_ what would be happening.  
  
For the first time in a very long time, Jared had no idea what to do. He wanted to be out with Jeff, ear to the ground, twisting arms and wringing information out of people. But, Jeff was right; Jared wasn’t in the right frame of mind to be out in the city dealing with things. There was nothing rational about the way he wanted to proceed. He had moments of all-encompassing, blind rage. The fear inside him was almost suffocating. He knew what Mark was capable of, and the idea of Jensen having to face any of it was gut-wrenching.  
  
Jared tried not to drown out his fear with whiskey. He needed to be ready to go as soon as Jeff found out something … anything. He _tried_ to just keep breathing.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
When Jared woke, he wasn’t convinced he’d ever really been asleep. He remembered sitting down near Danneel. She had nestled closer, ending up cuddled against Jared’s side. The warmth of her small body comforted Jared a little. He knew that Danneel adored Jensen; there really was no one else he would want with him.  
  
Jared ran his fingers through Danneel’s rich, red, ponytail. There were strands of gold and black mixed in with the red; Jared had never noticed before. There were probably a lot of things that he didn’t notice.  
  
“Any news?” Danneel said softly.  
  
“No.” Jared cleared his throat, which was dry and sore.  
  
Jared tried to smooth down the wisps of hair escaping Danneel’s ponytail with his hand.  
  
“I _bet_ I look like roadkill,” Danneel muttered as she struggled to sit up.  
  
“You look good,” Jared said. He looked down at his hands while Danneel tried to smooth her hair back.  
  
“Did Jensen ever tell you about the day he first came into the Club ?”  
  
Not confident he would be able to answer, Jared just shook his head. He and Jensen hadn’t really spoken about his reasons for coming to find help; Jared had always been more focused on the fact that Jensen was there with him. It had never mattered to Jared how he’d made his journey.  
  
Danneel pulled her knees up onto the sofa and wrapped her arms around them. “One of the girls had told him about the Club, that there was help. He said he wanted a change.”  
  
Jared nodded again. He wanted Danneel to fill the silence with talking. He hadn’t the strength to make conversation but silence just made Jensen’s absence more pronounced.  
  
When Danneel looked up, there was a warm smile on her face. “He saw you that day.”  
  
“He did?” Jared remembered struggling not to stare at Jensen once he had spotted him across the Club. He didn’t remember Jensen noticing him, though.  
  
When Danneel nodded, her ponytail bobbed. “He said there was a tall, hot guy staring, and he wanted to know who you were.”  
  
“Did you tell him?” Jared couldn’t begin to imagine how Danneel might have introduced him.  
  
Smiling knowingly, Danneel rested her chin on her knees. “I told him you were the owner of the Club.”  
  
Jared pushed his own hair back out of his eyes and took a deep breath. If only that were all he was, Jared’s life would be a lot easier. “Why did he come to the Club?”  
  
“You’ve never asked him?” Danneel looked surprised.  
  
“I didn’t. I didn’t want to feel like I had to tell him about the things I’d done.” It wasn’t glamorous, it wasn’t a Hollywood film. Jared had killed people. He had given orders that had resulted in people being hurt. He’d punched men until they gave him the answers he had wanted. He’d been violent and ruthless, and he’d done it all because he wanted to live a better life.  
  
Danneel nodded slowly. “He’d been living on the streets. He’d run from home because his dad found out he was gay and threatened him. Jensen didn’t want to stay there so he took what money he had and got a bus as far as he could go. He got off here and stayed. He lived in alleys, under bridges, but he stayed clean. And, surprisingly, he never worked the streets. He stole from roadside stalls, traded with people, stayed smart. And then he heard about us.”  
  
“He’s a better man than me,” Jared said softly.  
  
“You’re a good man, Jared. Jensen has always known that.” Danneel smiled. “Know what he said the first time he saw you?”  
  
Jared shook his head.  
  
“Jensen said you looked lonely and sad. He told me that you looked like the kind of man with a past he wasn’t proud of,” Danneel continued. “Of course, I asked him what he thought you needed. He said that you needed him.”  
  
A familiar warmth bloomed in Jared’s chest, and he ran his thumb along his bottom lip. He _needed_ Jensen. He would always need Jensen .  
  
“We will find him,” Danneel said. “I know it in my heart.” Danneel unwound her arms and reached out to slip her hand over Jared’s.  
  
There was no confidence in Jared’s heart, not a single iota. He knew that he should have hope, but that had never been the way his life worked. Mark was a force of nature, a _terrible_ force of nature.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
_When Jared arrived at the address Mark had texted him, he had to force himself to head inside, to the basement of the tall building. It was the smell of blood that hit him first. Bile crawled up his throat, and Jared pressed his hand over his mouth for a few moments. He knew that Mark had been angry, betrayed and bitter. But the scene inside the warehouse was a slaughter. Jared knew there were two people dead. He knew the men, knew that they’d gone behind Mark’s back and undercut his drug business. It was impossible to tell from the carnage where one body ended and another began.  
  
Mark stood twenty feet away. His t-shirt and jeans were covered in blood. There was blood on his face, streaked through his hair and covering the hunting knife he still clutched in his right hand. He had killed two men, eviscerated them, cut off limbs. And there was a smile on his face.  
  
It was that moment that Jared realized how dangerous Mark was._  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
“She’ll be here soon, Jared. Stop pacing. You’re making me nervous.” Danneel was still at the Penthouse. Jared had tried to get her to go home, but she wouldn’t even entertain it.  
  
In the late afternoon, a text had come from Alona. She had some information that she wanted to tell Jared.  
  
Jeff had been suspicious when Alona had approached him and said she had information. When he called Jared, he said he wanted to speak to Alona himself, but Jared had insisted that she be brought straight to the Penthouse.  
  
Gil had gone to pick up Alona and Jeff from the Club and was on his way back.  
  
“She’s only been clean a little while, so don’t be too hard on her,” Danneel said firmly. She was always protective of the women she worked with.  
  
“I won’t,” Jared said. He paced over to the window and stared down at the road below. It was too far for him to make out the vehicles, but it made him feel better to look.  
  
“You will, because you’re worried, but I will make sure that she’s okay.”  
  
“I know.” Jared turned and paced back across the room to the bar and poured himself a soda water.  
  
Danneel sat down on the sofa and smoothed her t-shirt down. She was wearing one of Jensen’s. It was far too big for her, but she didn’t seem to mind.  
  
“Do you trust Alona?”  
  
“I do,” Danneel said quickly. “She’s young, but she was serious about cleaning up.”  
  
“How can you tell?”  
  
“By the look in her eyes.”  
  
“The look in her eyes?” Jared was always a little mystified by Danneel.  
  
“Yes. If you pay attention, you can see when people are ready for a change. It’s like a spark or a light. Jensen had it, too. Only when he saw you, though.”  
  
There was part of Jared that desperately wanted to believe that he was Jensen’s future, but his mind was guarded. They _had_ to get him back.  
  
“He loves you. I wish you would-”  
  
A sharp rap on the door made Danneel jump.  
  
“Come in,” Jared called out. He fixed his gaze on Danneel for a few moments before turning toward the door.  
  
Gil was first through the door, followed by a petite blonde. Jeff brought up the rear and closed the door behind him.  
  
Alona’s knee-high boots were worn black vinyl, matched with a red mini skirt and a tank top under a fluffy white jacket. There were dark circles under her brown eyes, and she was quite pale.  
  
“I’m Jared. We haven’t been introduced before.” Jared reached out and shook Alona’s small hand.  
  
“My name is Alona. I - I’ve been meeting with Danneel. She told me you would put me through school.” The young woman looked nervous and stuffed her hands in her jacket pockets as though she didn’t know what to do with them.  
  
“Danneel told me about you,” Jared said. “I’m happy to help.”  
  
“You’re a good man,” Alona said quietly. “I’ve heard lots of things about you. How you help people who want to get off the streets.”  
  
Jared nodded and glanced over at Jeff. His friend looked tense and a little agitated. He probably hadn’t slept in days. “Everyone, please sit down.”  
  
Looking relieved, Jeff sank down on one of the huge leather armchairs. Gil wandered over to lean against the wall by the window.  
  
Danneel patted the sofa beside her. “Come sit, Alona.”  
  
Heels clicking on the floor, Alona headed over and sat down beside Danneel.  
  
When Danneel caught Jared’s eye, she nodded to the chair opposite the sofa.  
  
Jared sat down and smiled at Alona. “Danneel said you had something you wanted to tell me?”  
  
“I was out in Mark’s territory today,” Alona said hesitantly. Her gaze darted from Jared to Danneel and then back again.  
  
“Honey, I thought you weren’t going back,” Danneel said.  
  
Fidgeting nervously, Alona looked down at her fingers and began picking at her chipped nail polish. “I like Jensen. People were talking in the Club. They said that he was in trouble.”  
  
News was travelling _very_ quickly. Of course, there was always the possibility that the news had come from one of Mark’s people. It couldn’t hurt to plant information when you wanted to have an impact on someone. Jared nodded when he realized Alona was still staring at him. “What did you do?”  
  
Alona gripped her hands together tightly. “I went back out and asked around. I found out that Mark has been going to the old Pacific Building .”  
  
“He has?” Jared shifted to the edge of his seat. Behind him, he heard Jeff pull his phone out and send a text message. The Pacific Building was where Mark had killed the two men who’d betrayed him. It was the very place Jared had realized how insane Mark was and what he was capable of.  
  
“Is that all, Alona?” Jared tried to keep his voice calm and steady.  
  
“Someone told me that Jensen was there, but I don’t know for sure. I didn’t see him myself. People like you, though, Jared. I don’t think they would lie.”  
  
Jared reached across and squeezed Alona’s hand. He forced himself to smile and make eye contact. “Thank you, Alona.”  
  
“No problem. You’ve been nice to me, and Danneel says you help her all the time.” Alona twisted some strands of her hair around her index finger.  
  
“I’m glad we’ve been able to help you,” Jared said as steadily as he could. Finally, he had to drop his gaze. “Jeff.”  
  
“I’m on it,” Jeff said as he stood.  
  
Jared grabbed Jeff’s wrist and held on tightly. “The Pacific Building. Mark and I – he’s got history with that place.”  
  
Jeff covered Jared’s hand with his own for a few moments. “Just let us see what we can find out. We’ll have one crack at this.”  
  
Jeff was right. Mark was far too smart to stay in one place for long. He nodded.  
  
Jeff squeezed Jared’s hand, then turned quickly. “Gil?”  
  
The two men left the Penthouse. There was a tight band around Jared’s chest.  
  
“I should go,” Alona said hesitantly.  
  
When Jared looked up, he could see that Alona was frightened. “Stay as long as you like. And thank you for telling me. Whether it pans out or not, I appreciate you trying to help.”  
  
Danneel looked very pleased and smiled warmly at Jared before reaching for Alona’s hand. “C’mon, let’s make you something to eat. When Gil comes back, he’ll give you a ride back to the Club.”  
  
Danneel pulled Alona up off the couch, and as they headed past Jared, Alona’s small hand settled so lightly on Jared’s cheek it felt like a warm breeze. “If you need more help, I can go back out there.”  
  
Jared covered Alona’s hand with his and smiled. “Please, don’t go back. Jensen wouldn’t like that. And I’m glad that you’ve decided to let us help you.”  
  
There were tears welling in Danneel’s eyes when she met Jared’s gaze. “Come on, Alona.”  
  
As the two women moved into the kitchen, Jared sank back into the chair. The sound of their voices was comforting, but it didn’t stop Jared’s mind from racing.  
  
He felt helpless. He knew that Jeff would find out if there were any truth to what Alona had heard. But it took a lot for Jared to keep himself from racing over to the Pacific Building to just bust the damned door down.  
  
For the hundredth time that day, Jared was glad that Jeff was on his side.  
  
For the time being, though, it was Jared’s role to wait. He’d never realized how bad he was at it.  
  


 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
It was well into the evening when Jeff finally returned to the Penthouse, Jared was beyond impatient. It was all he could do to allow Jeff time to get inside and take a seat.  
  
“I’ve had people watching the building since Alona was here. We’ve also hit the streets to see what we could find out.”  
  
Jared handed Jeff a coffee and sat down opposite him with his own. “And?”  
  
“Mark’s been coming and going. He’s trying to be discreet about it, but he’s an idiot. He thinks because he ignores some people, they can’t see him. But they remember you. You did what had to be done, Mark did what he enjoyed.”  
  
Nodding, Jared took a sip of his coffee to stop himself from telling Jeff to get on with it.  
  
“I checked the real estate listings. Pellegrino bought the building recently. There’s always someone there, twenty-four hours a day. There’s been a doctor there a couple of times.”  
  
There was a burn in Jared’s eyes, and he lifted a hand to rub at them. “A doctor.”  
  
“I know it sounds bad,” Jeff continued. “But it could mean Jensen’s alive. And we ran into a guy who claimed to have seen someone who fit Jensen’s description.”  
  
Jared’s gaze was on Jeff’s immediately. “You get close enough to see anything?”  
  
Looking sad and frustrated, Jeff shook his head. He rubbed his hand over the beard that was appearing on his jaw. It had probably been days since Jeff had been home. Jared had lost track of time; he couldn’t stand to think of how long Jensen had been gone.  
  
“There was no way to get close without drawing attention. If Pellegrino gets wind of us, he’ll move Jensen, and we’ll lose our advantage.” Jeff clasped his hands around his mug tightly as though he were drawing strength from it.  
  
“You and I need to go in,” Jared said firmly.  
  
Jeff nodded. “You and I need to go in.”  
  
There was so much at stake that Jared wasn't sure he even knew where to start. With the glimmer of hope came the crushing fear and worry. Like he’d always known, hope was a dangerous thing.


	3. Chapter 3

  


  
  


  
Jeff wanted to bring Gil and several other men with them to the Pacific Building. Jared insisted they go alone.  
  
More people meant more possibility of being discovered. If Jensen was in the building, Jared needed every advantage. Jeff and Jared had always worked well together. If anyone had a chance to get inside undetected, it was them.  
  
The evening air was cool, and Jared took a deep breath as he climbed out of the car. They were a few blocks away from the Pacific Building in an unstaffed parking garage. Dressed in dark clothes, they were armed and ready for almost anything. There was no guarantee that things would go well, but the location was the only lead they had.  
  
Jared couldn’t even face the thought that Jensen might _not_ be in the building. That was a possible future that Jared couldn't deal with. There was no backup plan for Jared that didn’t involve Jensen; that was how he kept putting one foot in front of the other.  
  
They made their way separately to the back of the Pacific Building, another precaution, then met just outside the smallest loading bay door.  
  
The building had been built in the seventies. Among other things, it had housed a newspaper publisher. When Jeff had researched the history of the building, he had found the most current floor plans and the sales documents. Very few changes had been made over the years. There was no alarm system, little security, and the building had been vacant for a long time before Pellegrino had purchased it.  
  
They used the shadows in the alley behind the building to approach almost silently.  
  
Jeff had received some intel from a local that there had been lights on in the basement of the building. They would need to make their way into the loading bay on the ground level and find a way to the basement.  
  
“You can still wait back at the car,” Jeff whispered.  
  
Jared shook his head. If Jensen was in the basement, then Jared wanted to get to him as soon as possible. He wouldn’t be dissuaded.  
  
Jeff headed to the personnel door just to the right off the loading bay. After a slight hesitation, he went to work on the door lock. It only took him moments to pop the lock and glance over at Jared.  
  
When Jeff’s gloved hand turned the doorknob, it squeaked quietly, but clicked open.  
  
Jared knew that Jeff had made as little noise as possible, but the sound seemed deafening in the late-night air.  
  
Jeff pushed the door open. Nothing but darkness inside the building.  
  
Jared slipped through the door, sliding his handgun out of its shoulder holster.  
  
They moved silently along a long corridor. Jared knew from the floor plans that the corridor led to a metal catwalk that ran the perimeter of the basement.  
  
The two men paused a few times, listening for any clue that they weren’t alone. Step after cautious step, they heard nothing. The only hint there may be life in the building was a slight glow from the basement below.  
  
There was a gate at the start of the catwalk which Jeff began working on. It took a little more time than the door because the lock was rusty with disuse.  
  
Jared’s nerves were raw. He was sweating, his heart was racing, and he gripped his handgun so tightly that his fingers ached. He adjusted his grip as Jeff finally worked the lock open.  
  
When the gate swung open, it made a loud grating sound. Then Jared’s heart nearly stopped. An overhead light cracked on, and Jared was momentarily blinded.  
  
Jeff rolled to the side as he passed through the gate. Jared dropped to his belly and crawled forward.  
  
Somewhere down below, a heavy metal door opened and closed. Jared held his breath. He hoped the sound would cover the noise they’d made getting past the gate. He closed his eyes for a few moments, then blinked them open slowly.  
  
Huge, bright warehouse lights hung from the ceiling above them.  
  
Voices echoed up from the floor below. Jared crawled forward until he could see through the metal fence that bordered the catwalk.  
  
For a few terrifying seconds, Jared’s heart stopped completely.  
  
Jensen _was_ there, as well as Pellegrino and three other men.  
  
But Jared’s eyes couldn’t move away from Jensen.  
  
He was in the middle of the basement floor. There was a support column with a beam of wood attached to it, and Jensen was tied to it as though crucified. His arms stretched out along the beam, bound at the wrist, elbow, and shoulder. He was shirtless, clad only in the striped pajama pants that were his favorites.  
  
“Jared,” Jeff whispered.  
  
There were bruises on Jensen’s face, neck, and chest. Blood had dried on his lip and all down his body.  
  
Dark fury swirled to life in Jared’s chest. Jensen was alive, but he’d been beaten by someone, probably Mark, and he’d been alone and frightened, and Jared hadn’t been there.  
  
“Jared!” Jeff hissed. His fingers dug into Jared’s shoulder hard enough to hurt.  
  
The pain pierced the shell of Jared’s anger. He had climbed up into a crouch. When he finally tore his gaze away from Jensen, Jeff’s gaze was hard and focused. “You need to calm the _fuck_ down.”  
  
For the span of a few heartbeats, Jared felt his anger dart towards Jeff. How could he ask him to calm down?”  
  
“You can’t help Jensen if you get shot,” Jeff whispered as he pulled Jared back down to the metal walkway beneath their feet. “You’ve always told me to take the extra time to _think_ before I head into anything.”  
  
Even though Jeff was whispering, Jared was familiar with the tone of his voice. It was the tone he took with Jared when he really needed to be heard.  
  
Jared swallowed, his throat raw and sore with tension. His gaze moved back to Jensen once more, but he nodded.  
  
“Okay,” Jeff said softly. His grip on Jared’s shoulder relaxed, and he patted Jared’s shoulder before reaching down to take the safety off his gun. “We need to make sure we know who’s down there, yeah?”  
  
Without taking his eyes off his lover’s battered body, Jared nodded again. He was _so_ close to Jensen, but Jeff was right. It wasn’t the time to do something completely stupid. Jensen needed them.  
  
Jared filled his lungs with the musty warehouse air, then blew it out slowly. Finally, he looked around the basement.  
  
There were three men, probably the ones guarding Jensen. They would be armed, good shots, and maybe a little bored.  
  
Mark. Jared knew Mark well. He would be enjoying _every_ moment of Jensen’s captivity. He would want to savor every moment.  
  
As the thoughts in Jared’s mind began to settle, he turned to face Jeff. “He’s going to want to be alone with Jensen. We need to get down there.”  
  
Without any hesitation, Jeff nodded. He glanced left, then right, and gestured towards a set of metal stairs off in the shadows.  
  
Jared traced the path of the stairs with his gaze. If they were careful, they could make it down to the basement floor without being spotted. They could take cover behind a wall of boxes at the base of the stairs.  
  
They moved slowly and quietly on the rusty old stairs. Jared tried to keep an eye on Jensen, but he couldn’t afford a misstep. Not when he was so close to getting to his lover.  
  
As they got closer to the basement floor, a voice echoed up toward them. After a few more excruciatingly slow steps down, Jared recognized the voice as Mark’s.  
  
“Jensen. It seems like it’s time,” Mark said in a low voice.  
  
Jared almost stumbled, but managed to catch himself at the last moment. He couldn’t help looking down to where Jensen was. There was no discernible expression on his face, which scared Jared. But he couldn’t let his mind start wandering to what Jensen may have been through. Not yet.  
  
When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Mark had moved closer to his men. They spoke in hushed tones.  
  
Jeff reached Jared’s side as they stepped down onto the concrete floor. They crouched down and took cover behind the stacked boxes.  
  
There was some movement, and Jared held his breath as he tried to pinpoint the men’s locations.  
  
A door clanged open, and Jeff managed to find a vantage point between two of the boxes on the bottom row. He held up his hand to keep Jared still as he watched.  
  
Jared closed his eyes and leaned back against the boxes. Footsteps moved further away from them. He could hear Mark’s voice, just the familiar tone of it, no actual words. Bile rose in his throat again.  
  
Finally, the door slammed. Nothing but silence for a long time. When Jared opened his eyes, Jeff held up a single finger: Mark was now alone with Jensen.  
  
Jeff tapped his ear to indicate Jared should listen and went back to watching.  
  
“So, Jensen.” Mark’s voice was louder, and a little more animated. Jared felt his shoulders stiffen because he could _hear_ the smile in Pellegrino’s voice.  
  
“Now that I’ve had the boys beat a little respect into you, are you feeling friendlier?”  
  
Jeff moved his hand slowly towards Jared until he could grip the shoulder of his jacket. He never once looked away from Jensen.  
  
There was no reply from Jensen; at least, none that Jared could hear. He clamped his teeth together so tightly that his jaw ached.  
  
Mark was speaking again, too quietly for a few moments. Then there was a shuffling sound, and his voice grew louder. “So, here’s the thing, Jensen. I think it’s about time that I got to see what’s so special about you.”  
  
Jared bit down on his bottom lip so hard that blood trickled down his chin. He wiped it away with the back of his hand.  
  
“I wonder if _I_ fuck you, maybe I’ll understand what’s made Jared so crazy about you.”  
  
The only thing that stopped Jared from scrambling to his feet was the firm grip of Jeff’s hand.  
  
“He wants to live happily ever after with you, Jensen. But, we just can’t have that. I mean, _really_? I’ve put a lot of effort into making sure that Jared will be miserable. _This_ is perfect.”  
  
Jared could feel himself beginning to tremble with rage, an incessant pounding in his head.  
  
Finally, Jeff looked over at him. He gestured over to the right: there was a second door. He leaned in to whisper in Jared’s ear. “Door will get me around behind the grunts. I’ll take them out. You get Jensen. Mark has his back to us.”  
  
Jeff’s fingers were still tight on Jared’s jacket as he stared into his eyes.  
  
After a deep breath, Jared nodded. He’d never relied on Jeff more for anything. It was the quiet confidence of his best friend that was allowing him to hang on to the last of his sanity. Jared nodded.  
  
Jeff patted Jared’s shoulder once, then disappeared into the shadows under the stairs.  
  
Jared kept his gaze on the door Jeff had shown him. Jeff needed to get out the door, go around the outside, and take out the guards. Jared _had_ to give him enough time to do that.  
  
Jeff appeared in a crouch by the door, and, as Jared watched, opened it silently, inch by inch.  
  
While the heavy door opened, Jared held his breath. One sound and they’d be fucked.  
  
The door stopped moving. Jared saw Jeff glance back at him and nod before he slipped through the narrow opening.  
  
Wiping his free hand over his face, Jared took a deep breath. Then he stood.  
  
“Let’s get you untied so you can show me how much you appreciate my hospitality,” Mark said as he stepped close enough to Jensen to untie his bonds.  
  
All the blood in Jared’s veins ran ice cold as Mark ran his hand along Jensen’s bruised arm. He swallowed his rage and moved out from behind the boxes.  
  
As Jared moved closer, he stayed directly behind Mark so that he was out of sight. Mark was speaking to Jensen, but Jared tried to block the words out as he put one foot in front of the other slowly and deliberately.  
  
One of Jensen’s arms fell to his side, and Jared could see the blood that was drying on his hand. Another step. Mark untied Jensen’s left arm.  
  
By the time Jared was five steps from Mark, there was only one rope left around Jensen’s middle.  
  
Jensen’s head fell to the side, and Jared’s heart fell, too. There was no life in Jensen’s eyes. There were bruises all down one side of his face, and his lip was swollen and split.  
  
When Mark released the final rope, Jensen collapsed against Mark.  
  
Catching Jensen under both arms, Mark laughed. He held Jensen close, with Jensen’s chin resting on Mark’s shoulder. He was hurt badly.  
  
The slightest movement off to the right caught Jared’s attention.  
  
 _Jeff._  
  
When the two friends made eye contact, Jeff was thirty feet from Mark’s back. He’d taken care of the other men.  
  
At the very moment, Jared looked back at Jensen, their eyes met. There were tears glistening on Jensen’s lashes. For a few moments, he looked as though he couldn't believe that he was seeing Jared. Then his lashes fluttered, and Jared could see the relief on his lover’s face.  
  
“Let’s get you over to the table,” Mark said. But, as he tried to turn them, Jensen reached up and rested a shaking hand on Mark’s jaw. He held Mark’s chin with his hand and prevented him from turning in Jared’s direction.  
  
“Decided to be nice to me finally?” Mark asked delightedly. “I will _love_ sending you back to Jared all … dirtied up. All you had to do all this time was give it up. I fuck you, and you can go home.”  
  
Very slowly, Jensen nodded. For the slightest moment, his eyes flicked towards Jared before he looked back at Mark. A tear moved over Jensen’s bruised cheek and trailed through the blood dried at the corner of his mouth.  
  
Without taking his eyes off Jensen, Jared lifted his hand to signal for Jeff to make his move.  
  
In a flash, Jeff closed the distance between himself and Mark.  
  
Jared moved at the exact same time.  
  
As Jeff’s arm slid around Mark’s neck, Jared reached under Jensen’s arm and swung him back. With his free hand, he reached under Mark’s jacket and snatched his gun out of its holster.  
  
Mark let out a grunt as the butt of Jeff’s handgun collided with his temple. His eyes rolled back in his head, and he fell against Jeff.  
  
“Got him,” Jeff growled.  
  
Jared finally got both arms around Jensen and lowered him to the floor. He held Jensen gently and set his hand on Jensen’s bruised chest. “Jen?”  
  
For a little while, Jensen’s dark lashes lay against his battered cheeks, and then he opened his eyes. His gaze looked distant at first, even unfocused.  
  
Jared leaned down a little closer and trailed his fingers across Jensen’s cheek. “I’m so sorry I didn’t get here sooner.”  
  
Jensen’s gaze finally settled on Jared’s. “I knew you’d come.”  
  
Nodding, Jared leaned down to press a kiss to Jensen’s forehead. It seemed like the only part of Jensen’s face that hadn’t been battered.  
  
“Jared?” Jeff’s voice was tight with anger. “He’s comin’ around.”  
  
Jared nodded, but he was still staring at Jensen when Jeff knelt at his side. He slid his hand under Jensen’s neck and nodded for Jared to move.  
  
 _Pellegrino._  
  
He lay on his back. His head moved slightly, and his fingers twitched.  
  
As he stood, Jared pulled his gun free from the holster. He strode over to Mark, crouched down, and pressed the muzzle of his gun to Mark’s temple. Their eyes met  
  
“You should never have touched him,” Jared said in a low voice thick with emotion.  
  
A smile appeared on Mark’s face as he peered up at Jared. “He’s broken now. He’ll never be that pure boy you wanted.”  
  
“You don’t know anything about him!” Jared spat. Looking at Mark’s face made Jared feel ill. All he could think about was Mark putting his hands-on Jensen’s body.  
  
“He _wanted_ me, Jared.” Pellegrino laughed, and the sound of it made Jared’s skin crawl.  
  
“ _You_ should _never_ have touched him,” Jared said.  
  
The smile on Mark's face turned into a sneer, and Jared pulled the trigger.  
  
He stared down for a few moments, and then he holstered his gun. Blood poured from the hole in Mark’s temple and pooled around his head like a bloody halo. Mark’s face was blank, his expression wiped away by death, and he looked uncharacteristically calm. It was strange to see the body lying there, knowing all the history between them. Mark had been a cruel man, and one of the cruelest things he had done was to take Jensen.  
  
“We need to get out of here,” Jeff said. He lifted Jensen’s body slightly and began to pick him up.  
  
“I’ll take him,” Jared said sharply. Jared lifted Jensen, an arm under his shoulders, the other under his knees.  
  
“Let me help,” Jeff said quietly. “It’ll be faster.”  
  
“No.” Jared hiked Jensen closer to his chest and got his balance, then headed for the door. He had no intention of letting go of Jensen.  
  


  
  


 

 

 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Two days passed before Jensen woke up for anything more than a trip to the bathroom. Jared insisted that a doctor see Jensen. There were no broken bones, and he only needed stitches on a few cuts. Even though the doctor suggested a CAT scan, Jared had given in to Jensen’s request to stay at the Penthouse. So they stayed home. The only time Jared left his side was when Danneel made him take a shower. She said that Jared needed to take care of himself if he was going to look after Jensen.  
  
Danneel hadn’t gone home since Jared had brought Jensen back to the Penthouse. She insisted on being there to cook and make sure that Jared got some rest. Jared knew that she was worried about Jensen. He was like a little brother to her.  
  
Jared rested, but did whatever he had to do at Jensen’s side.  
  


 

 

 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
The morning of Jensen’s third day at home, Jared awoke to Jensen’s fingers trailing over the back of his hand.  
  
Jared opened his eyes slowly and smiled at Jensen. He’d become used to Jensen’s virtual silence. He was just glad to have Jensen home and safe; if Jensen needed time, then Jared would give him as much time as he needed.  
  
“Jared? I … I didn’t. With him.”  
  
“It doesn’t matter,” Jared said quickly. The time Jensen had been held captive was still a mystery to Jared. He wasn’t an idiot; he could see what Jensen had been through physically. Words could be a terrible weapon, though, and only Jensen knew what had been said to him. He hadn’t spoken about the things Mark had said, and Jared didn’t know if he ever would.  
  
The expression on Jensen’s face hardened, and he struggled to sit up slightly. “It _does_ matter. I need you to know I would never do that to you. You trust me. And I love you, more than I’ve ever loved anyone.”  
  
It was the most Jensen had said since he’d come home, the emotion in his voice overwhelmingly honest. Jared felt something deep inside him crumble away. He reached out and slid his hand over Jensen’s cheek. “I love you, Jensen.”  
  
Tears welled in Jensen’s eyes. and he leaned closer to Jared’s hand.  
  
“Jensen, what I did to Mark. It’s not the first time. I’ve done things. I used to say that it was a wrong that was for a greater good, but I was lying to myself. I just wanted a different life than what I had. You took a different route altogether. If you can’t stay with me-“  
  
Jensen pulled back and stared at Jared for a while. “There is _nothing_ you could tell me that would change how I feel about the man you are now.”  
  
Even though he was still a bit afraid that he would hurt Jensen, Jared pulled him into a gentle embrace. That was when Jensen’s walls seemed to crumble.  
  
Jensen’s entire body shook as he began to sob against Jared’s chest. The damp warmth of tears soaked through Jared’s t-shirt slowly, but he didn’t care. He’d been given a second chance to have Jensen in his life, and he planned to live it without a single regret. And how could he ever regret having Jensen there in his arms?  
  
Speaking softly, Jared rested his cheek on the top of Jensen’s head. “When I thought I’d lost you...I didn’t know what to do.”  
  
Jensen’s arms tightened around Jared, and he held on as though his life depended on it. Perhaps in that moment it did.  
  


 

 

 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Jensen healed slowly. There were no broken bones, no internal injuries, but most of his body was bruised and scraped. As Jared cared for Jensen, he watched the bruises darken, then blossom with new color, before they finally faded slowly.  
  
The cuts on Jensen’s face took longer to disappear. Angry red slashes slowly morphed into pale, white lines. It didn’t change how beautiful Jensen was in Jared’s eyes. The scars were just part of their story together, part of Jensen’s life.  
  
As days slipped past, Jared became used to the bustle in the Penthouse. Danneel had taken over one of the spare rooms, and Jared hadn’t asked her to leave. She belonged near Jensen as he recovered.  
  
Jeff stopped by daily because he was running everything to do with Jared’s business. There had been no repercussions from Mark's death. Everyone who had worked for him seemed to feel that Mark had crossed a line in the first place by taking Jensen. But, if anything had happened, Jeff would have been ready; Jensen’s injuries had affected him. Jared could see it in his friend's eyes.  
  
Jared couldn’t bring himself to devote any energy to the _business_. He helped Jeff when he could, but all he could focus on were the plans he was undertaking to withdraw completely and create a new life for himself, and, he hoped, Jensen. He had invested everything in an uncertain future.  
  
Alona stopped by a few times to visit Jensen. Jared always left them alone together; he felt that his presence made Alona a little nervous. When he wasn’t in the room, he would hear the light, sing-song sound of her laughter, and it always made him smile.  
  
Once Jensen began to move around again, things returned to _almost_ normal. Even Danneel finally moved back to her own apartment, although Jared would have been glad to have her there as long as she wanted.  
  
As each day passed, Jared was closer to completing his plans, and Jensen was a little more healed.  
  
At first, Jensen didn’t want to leave the Penthouse. It didn’t really make much sense to Jared. After all, Jensen had been taken from their home. But, Jensen said that home was where he felt safe.  
  
So Jared stayed with Jensen whenever he could. When he couldn’t be at home, he arranged for Danneel to _visit_.  
  
Day after day, one foot in front of the other.  
  
Then one day, all the planning finally paid off for Jared. He had made his purchases, handed off everything business-related to Jeff. He’d made travel plans and signed legal documents. He was finally ready. There was only one thing left to do.  
  


 

 

 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  
As the sun sneaked through the gap between the curtains, Jared rolled over and kissed Jensen on the tip of his nose.  
  
“Too early,” Jensen muttered. He pressed his sleep-warm body up against Jared’s chest.  
  
“We have somewhere we need to go today,” Jared murmured into Jensen’s hair.  
  
“I don't want to go anywhere.”  
  
“This is important,” Jared answered.  
  
With a low groan, Jensen rolled away onto his back. “Why now?”  
  
It was a perfectly reasonable question. “Do you trust me ?”  
  
Realizing that Jared was serious, Jensen opened his eyes and frowned slightly. “What are you up to?”  
  
Jared reached for Jensen’s hand and held it tightly. “Trust me, and come with me.”  
  
There was a bemused expression on Jensen’s face. “Always.”  
  
“Get your ass dressed then. We have a plane to catch in two hours.”  
  
Jensen’s eyes widened, and he propped himself up on his elbows. “We have a _what_?”  
  


 

 

 

 

  


  
  
  
  
  
  
  


The flight was just long enough for Jared to get extremely nervous. Jensen had asked once where they were going, but Jared just couldn’t bring himself to explain. He wanted to _show_ Jensen.

Fortunately for Jared, Jensen not only trusted him, but was also very patient.

It wasn’t until Jared was driving the rental truck down the private road that he realized how everything had come down to one pivotal moment.

Jared parked beside a log house. He turned the truck off and sat there with his hands gripping the steering wheel.

After a long silence, Jensen cleared his throat. “Are we … there?”

Jared nodded, pried his fingers off the steering wheel, and opened his door so he could climb out.

The air was warm, dry, and still fresh. None of the sharp, metallic scents from the city.

Jensen climbed out of the truck and walked around to stand beside Jared. “It’s a nice house.”

Jared nodded. “It is.”

“It’s a house near Austin. In Texas.”

“Yes.”

They were silent for a while, and Jared reached for Jensen’s hand. He tugged Jensen towards a path that ran along the side of the house. It was exactly as it had been in the photos the real estate agent had sent Jared. The path ended at a wrought iron gate that was equal parts vine and rust.

As Jensen walked beside Jared, he continued to look around him. “You have a key for the gate?”

“I do.” A UPS package had arrived at the Penthouse containing keys, garage door openers, and various other things. Jared hadn’t shown Jensen any of it

They rounded the corner of the house, and Jared couldn't help smiling. Lake Austin was as beautiful as he’d thought it would be, and it was right there in front of the house. The water was blue, sparkling in the late afternoon sun.

“Wow,” Jensen said quietly. He let go of Jared’s hand and walked closer to the lake.

Jared watched Jensen. He could see that his young lover looked a little tense. His shoulders looked tight, and his hands were fidgeting with his jeans.

Of course, Jensen was unsettled. He’d traveled for hours just based on his trust for Jared. And, it was time for Jared to return that trust.

“There’s a boathouse,” Jared said quietly.

“I see that,” Jensen answered.

“Nice boat. About a twenty-minute ride to the dock closest to the city limits.” Jared had done all the research, worked everything out down to the smallest details.

“Yeah?”

“House is over 2000 square feet. There's even a hot tub somewhere.” Jared looked around but couldn’t see any sign of the hot tub.

“Jared, _what_ are we doing here?” Jensen’s voice was strained, and when he looked up at Jared, his eyes were wide.

It was time.

Jared hooked his finger through Jensen’s belt loop and swallowed before rubbing his thumb along his bottom lip.

“Jared?”

“I own this house,” Jared began. “Well, I guess everything here. There’s about five acres of land, a lot of it waterfront.”

“Why do you own this?” Jensen’s eyes were even wider. “How long have you owned it? I had no idea.”

“I just bought it,” Jared answered quickly. “It’s all paid for. It’s my retirement.” It felt strange to say the words aloud to Jensen after thinking about it for so long.

“Your _what_?”

“Retirement.”

Mouth open slightly, Jensen just continued to stare at Jared.

Jared wet his lips and sighed. “I’ve turned everything over to Jeff. He’s great at it, probably better than I ever was.”

Jensen was shaking his head slowly. “Wow. I just. I mean. Wow.”

“I’m gonna live here,” Jared said a little breathlessly. It was finally a reality. But instead of feeling like a relief, it was feeling like a monumental moment.

The expression on Jensen’s face darkened slightly, and he took a step back, pulling his hand free of Jared’s grip. “You’re gonna live here?”

Things weren’t going at all how Jared had envisioned them. Jensen looked more scared than anything else.

“I have new identities for both of us. A married couple from California-”

“-both of us?” Jensen folded his arms across his chest.

“I want you to come with me, Jensen. I’ve been working on this for a long time. I want _out_. I’ve wanted out for - well - since I met you.”

Jensen rubbed his hands over his arms and tilted his head slightly. “You haven’t said a word to me about any of this.”

“You gave me a reason to want to get out, Jensen. I just want us to have a normal life. I _don’t_ want anything to _ever_ happen to you again.” Emotion welled up in Jared’s throat so that he had to stop speaking. He desperately wished that Jensen would say something that gave him hope. That maybe everything could work out the way Jared had wished it would.

Jensen ran both hands over his hair, then clasped them behind his neck. He looked away from Jared. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I want you to come with me,” Jared said softly. “You can work if you want. Take the boat to Austin. Or go to school, stay home with me. Whatever you want.”

Blinking slowly, Jensen shoved his hands into his pockets. But he remained silent.

For the first time since he’d begun planning his way out, Jared wondered if he’d made the wrong call. “You don’t have to come. I mean, it’s up to you. You can have the Penthouse if you want it. I’ll make sure that everything is okay for you.”

“Okay for me?” Jensen sounded a little annoyed.

“I _want_ you to come with me. I _love_ you. I want us to have a new … a better life. But if you can’t live here, if you don’t want to stay with me, I get it.” Jared finally ran out of things to say.

“There are things I just can’t leave behind,” Jensen said firmly.

Jared’s chest ached. All the ways he’d played out the conversation in his head, it had never ended with Jensen saying, _No_. Nodding once, Jared forced a smile onto his face.

“You’ve got to ask Danneel if she wants to come with us,” Jensen said.

“What?” When Jared looked up, he could see a stubborn set to Jensen’s jaw.

“Danneel. I want her to have a chance to come with us,” Jensen repeated. “I think she’ll want to.”

“Why?” Jared asked. He couldn’t help it. He’d planned everything for the two of them and assumed they would be leaving everyone else behind them.

“I like what I do,” Jensen answered steadily. “Danneel and I. We help a lot of people. We’re a good team. She’s been saving money for her own place for years.”

Jared was realizing that there were a lot of things he didn’t know about the people around him. “All right.”.

Turning to look out over the lake, Jensen took a deep breath. “You’ll _really_ have to marry me. I don’t want to be _fake_ married.”

Jared laughed, surprising himself. In seconds, he’d gone from feeling like he was going to lose everything to thinking he might get to have everything he wanted. “So. You’ll come with me?”

Jensen shrugged a shoulder, but a smile tugged at his lips. “I want to get married in a tuxedo. And you have to stop keeping secrets from me. _And_ I want at least one dog.”

The way that Jared’s heart was flip-flopping around in his chest, it was surprising he was still standing. “Okay.”

“Yes?” Jensen quirked an eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Then … yes,” Jensen said firmly.

Jared stepped closer, pressed up against Jensen. He slid his arms around him and nuzzled into his hair. The first step towards a completely new life -- the one that Jared had always wanted.

Jensen leaned into Jared. “Maybe two dogs.”

Nothing had ever made Jared happier in his life. Hell, he wasn’t sure how everything would play out, but with Jensen at his side, he felt like things would be okay.

 

 

 

_**ONE YEAR LATER** _

  
  
  
  
  


  
The boat drifted. Jared loved the rocking motion, like being in the world’s largest hammock.

The day was hot, the kind of hot that had persuaded Jared out of his t-shirt as soon as the motor on the boat had gone silent.

There was a bark, the sound of some scuffling in the cabin, and then Jensen emerged. “Go get Jared!”

Jared had just enough time to put his beer down behind him before two huge balls of fur crashed into him.

“Koda!” Jared yelled, but it did him no good whatsoever. Jensen had been the _pack leader_ since day one.

“Good dogs,” Jensen said proudly when Jared fell sideways off the bench, and Kuma tried to get on his lap.

“They’re not,” Jared grunted, “lapdogs.” A paw connected with his balls, and Jared groaned in pain.

“Who says huskies can't be lapdogs? I mean, technically, Kuma _is_ on your lap.” Jensen peered down at Jared with a grin on his face.

Kuma was on Jared’s lap, but Koda was a dead weight on Jared’s chest. “Help?”

Laughing, Jensen whistled a single note, and the two huskies clambered off Jared to pad over and sit beside Jensen.

Jared lay there on the boat deck looking up at his husband. “I get no respect from any of you .”

“I _told_ you to do the training with us.” Jensen looked around at the lake and let out a satisfied sigh. “It’s a gorgeous day.”

“It is.” Jared held out his hand so Jensen could help him up.

Jensen’s grip was strong, and Jared felt a little tug of happiness in his chest.

Now that Jensen was working with Danneel, he was getting quite toned. Combined with his summer tan, the overall effect was gorgeous. Jensen looked healthy, happy, not a care in the world.

“What are you thinking about?” Jensen asked. He pulled Jared over to the huge padded bench near the stern.

“You, as usual.”

“I like that.”

When he sat back down, Jared tugged Jensen down beside him. “You’re spoiled.”

“I deserve it.”

Jared nodded. He certainly wasn’t going to argue.

“Danneel texted. She asked if we wanted to have dinner with her and the new women at the house.”

When Jensen had asked Danneel if she wanted to leave the city and go with them, she had squealed and jumped into Jensen’s arms.

The two of them had been at the house a month before they began bringing home people who needed support to help get them off the streets. It hadn’t been long before Jared purchased another lakefront property for them. Danneel and Jensen went into town a few days a week, and the rest of their time was spent at the newly-renovated _Alona’s House_. It was a six-bedroom house set up as a non-profit agency, and it was full of love. Danneel worked with people on their self-esteem and social issues. Jensen helped to find jobs and training placements for people.

One of the things that Jared liked most was that no one knew who he was. The people at the house simply thought of Jared as Jensen’s husband.

It was a nice feeling.

“We can have dinner with them. Entirely up to you, though.” The longer he was away from the business, the more relaxed Jared became. It was great not feeling as though he had to be on guard all the time.

Jensen shifted closer. The next thing Jared knew, Jensen’s hand was rubbing over the front of his board shorts.

Jared could feel his cock begin to swell. “Dinner,” he murmured.

Chuckling, Jensen swung a leg over Jared’s lap and sat down. “I love how strong you are.”

“Mmm.” Jared could be agreeing to anything. All he could really think about was the fact that he was sliding his hands over the smooth material of Jensen’s swim trunks. He tucked his hands under Jensen’s firm ass and shifted him closer.

“So, do you want to go to dinner?”

“I don't care about anything but you right now,” Jared answered in a low voice. It was the absolute truth.

“You’ll care later when you’re starving,” Jensen murmured. As a smile curled onto his lips, he leaned in and let his lips ghost across Jared’s.

Little tingles made Jared lick his lips, and he lowered his head so he could mouth his way down the long stretch of Jensen’s throat.

“I want you,” Jensen said in a husky voice.

A burst of heat made Jared gasp. It didn’t matter how many times he heard it, it never ceased to make Jared feel like the luckiest man alive. After a deep breath, Jared smiled. “We’re in the middle of a lake.”

Lake Austin was huge, but there _were_ other people living along the shores. It wasn’t unusual for them to pass other boats if they were out on the lake for an afternoon.

Gaze steely, Jensen slid both arms around Jared’s neck. “Do you really think I care?”

A smirk on his face, Jared dropped his gaze but stayed quiet.

“Do you think that I _dislike_ it when people see you all spread out and … every inch of you there, wanting me… _mine_?” Jensen asked.

Jared’s breath caught. Jensen would _always_ have that effect on him. It would never change. As far as Jared was concerned, there wasn’t another being on the face of the earth as beautiful as Jensen. The fact that Jensen wanted him had pretty much made Jared believe in miracles.

The smooth warmth of Jensen’s lips moved across Jared’s forehead, down his temple, then trailed along the height of his cheek. “I love you.”

The words whispered across Jared’s sun-warmed cheek, and he felt the buzz of pleasure building inside him. At times, it built to such an intensity that Jared felt he might blow apart at the seams.

Jared cinched his arms tightly around Jensen, his fingers splayed wide against Jensen’s bare back. “You have to stay with me.”

“Is that a threat?”

Jared hadn’t meant it that way, but the love he felt for Jensen was so all-encompassing that, if it were to be taken away, Jared was no longer sure how much of him would be left. His gaze held Jensen’s for a few moments, and then he smiled slightly. No answer was the safest course of action.

Jensen’s eyes darkened, and his eyebrows lifted slightly. “There’s always been something a little dangerous about you, Jared.”

Trying to keep the expression on his face neutral, Jared tilted his head slightly and slid his hands down until his fingers pushed under the waistband of Jensen’s swim trunks.

“Good thing I have _no_ intention of leaving you,” Jensen murmured.

There had been enough talking as far as Jared was concerned. He pressed his lips to Jensen’s, parted them slowly, and let his tongue glide forwards.

Jensen’s body came alive. He tugged at Jared’s shoulders to pull him closer, let out a frustrated groan, then stood. He pushed Jared down onto his back so that he could pull his board shorts down off his narrow hips.

The sun was hot on Jared’s bare skin, but he didn’t care. The truth was that Jared _didn’t_ care who saw them, either. He had settled into his new role; he was just Jensen’s. There was nothing more important in the world.

Hands trailed down Jared’s chest, his sides, and then slid along the cut of his hip bones. Jensen dug his thumbs hard into Jared’s flesh and tugged his ass closer to the edge of the huge bench.

For a while, Jensen stared down at his lover. His eyes took in every inch of flesh before he finally reached down and slid two fingers through the pre-come already glistening on the head of Jared’s cock. He held those two fingers up and ran the side of his thumb along the underside of Jared’s cock .

The sharp edge of Jensen’s thumbnail grazing over his skin made Jared bite down hard on his bottom lip. The glide of that thumb continued down over his balls before pulling away.

Jensen grinned as he pulled a small packet of lube from a pocket in his trunks. He looked very pleased with himself as he smeared the slick liquid between his thumb and forefinger. The smile on his face broadened, he leaned forward, and then his fingers pushed into Jared’s ass slowly.

The distant sound of a motor on the lake made Jared shiver slightly. He turned his head a little to see if there was a boat coming their way.

It seemed that Jensen didn't appreciate Jared’s divided attention. He jammed three fingers into Jared’s ass.

Even though Jensen had fucked Jared earlier in the morning, the intrusion was a bit of a shock.

“Am I boring you?” Jensen asked. His voice was rough, deep and firm.

“N - no,” Jared answered. He clenched his ass around Jensen’s fingers as if to prove his point.

Resuming the slide of his fingers in, then withdrawing them slowly, Jensen knelt on the bench so he could lean down over Jared.

Jared tried to push up to catch Jensen's full lips, only to find himself shoved back down on the bench.

“You love this, don’t you?” Jensen whispered. His lips brushed Jared’s so lightly it was torture.

“Jensen, come on,” Jared said softly. _God_ , Jared had never come so close to begging for anything in his life. There was just never enough when it came to Jensen, and Jared's brain always wanted more, faster, and harder.

“Come on, _what_?” Jensen’s fingers stilled, stretching Jared’s ass open at an infuriatingly slow pace.

“Please,” Jared murmured. He bit down on his bottom lip and closed his eyes. There was no way to disguise the subtle twitching of his hips. His body wasn’t under his control anymore.

“You want this?” Jensen pushed his fingers _deep_ into Jared and then spread them until the stretching became an almost painful burn.

Jared’s head thumped back onto the bench, and he groaned. He grasped blindly at Jensen, nails digging into his lover’s back.

The curve of Jensen’s back slid under Jared’s palms, and, as Jensen’s hips pushed forward, his rock-hard cock pressed against Jared’s thigh.

Waves of pleasure were drowning Jared, and he opened his eyes to gaze up at the bright blue sky above them. He lifted a weak arm and slid his hand between their bodies so he could grip Jensen’s cock tightly. “I want _this_ ”

It was Jensen’s turn to moan with pleasure. He rolled forward onto Jared’s body and reached down to guide the head of his cock to Jared’s ass. He pushed forward slowly, deliberately, barely giving Jared a heartbeat of time to adjust.

Jared hooked a long leg around Jensen’s waist and urged him closer and deeper.

“You’re amazing,” Jensen said. His lips trailed down Jared’s neck, and he sucked hard enough to draw up a slight bruise on Jared’s shoulder.

The pain mingled with the pleasure. Soon all Jared could feel was the way he wanted Jensen. It was unrelenting. He stared up at the bright blue sky with a half-smile on his face and let his soul relax into the warmth of Jensen’s touch.

 

 

**The End**


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